Hit rock bottom. these are the words we like to hear, are afraid to hear, and get antsy waiting for it to happen. My W will hit rock bottom. She will het it very hard indeed. The clean up will be immense. I am almost ready for it. Understand this, based on my research and people from this site, her hitting rock bottom and coming out to figure out what went wrong will be a huge amount of pain for her. Before you can even begin to discuss your M/R, you will have to deal with her dealing with her. You are a ways away from that I am afraid to say, but not as long as you may think.
Understanding what she is going through, understanding what you need to do and want to do are all equally improtant in saving your marriage. It is a difficult balance. I am the most impatient person on earth, I am doing it. Just breathe, understadn she won't be back tomorrow. Let her come to you. do not beg, do not pursue. You did nothing wrong, let her come to you. Get the DB book, trust me it helps. Read it three times...
