Seeking advice on how to deal with outside child

[cat03]

Hi, my first suggestion is to stay in one thread so people know where you are coming from.

If you truly are sure he wants to come back you need to look inside your heart and see if you truly can forgive him, for everything. Trust will need to be rebuilt brick by brick son or no son. If he is still being disrespectful in the name of his son then you need to ask yourself if this man is good to have back.

This comes from a person who's H came back with half@ss intentions, just because he was lonely, it was a disaster... for the M to work he has to come with 100% FULL intention to work hard on the M, or you two won't have a standing chance. Piecing is as hard as being separated, it is 1 step forward, 2 steps back.

Make a list of what you think is reasonable (visitation, financial support of his son) and ask yourself if you are willing to work with your H about those issues.