So when we met to do the parenting plan, H tells me he drove by the party 'five or six times' (it was held at a restaurant my aunt works at, they are closed on sundays so they let us have our gatherings there often).
He said he was too embarrassed/ashamed to come in. I told him the only people who 'knew' were my parents and sisters...he said that was still enough to make him feel ashamed.
I went to the dining room table and sat down with the calendars for both of us and the parenting plan samples I had given him. He said he had already read them but then he spent an HOUR looking through them. Then he turned the papers over and just sighed. He doodled, "6:30-6:00" on the back.
I said what's that, he said, "I don't want the kids in daycare from 6:30-6 when I have them, because of my work". I told him that if he felt it was too much maybe he would prefer not to have them 50% of the time....
This led to more sighing, wringing of hands, etc.
At 8:30 we were still sitting there, and had not chosen a parenting plan..........
