You really didn't f**k up badly. I have had that same conversation with my W at least twice! We're human, and our spouses are putting us through hell, so we're entiteled to having our emotions run wild every now and then. Yesterday I was very hurt by my W, and what I did was come to the forum and journal and comment on a few other situations and afterwards I felt better. I was able to go downstairs and speak to my W in a friendly way. I think it is very important, as people keep telling me, to not let the WAS see us depressed or angry or hurt. That just reminds them that they don't want to be w/us anymore. Take a break from it all until the new year. Try to find peace and gather your thoughts. I have definitely felt like I was done with my W, but this morning I finally understood that letting go does not mean giving up. Take care of yourself and do your best to enjoy the holidays if you celebrate.
