I don't recognize her anymore

[WCW]

Good doggy. I hope your W didn't take her wrath out on the dog.

The UPS man doesn't like one of my dogs because my dog barks when he drives in. He won't even drive in if he sees the dogs outside, even when I am standing in the middle of the yard. Then I get a call from UPS customer service that he couldn't deliver because of loose dogs. I told the CS that I have hundreds of people in and out of my place and if my dog didn't like her delivery man there's a reason and my dog is a good judge of character.

Keep your chin up FIB.

I drove by a ChuckeeCheese the other day and thought of you.

[25yearsmlc]

FIB,

Thinking of you and wishing you a peaceful holiday.
((( j-)))

[faithisbelieving]

Thanks to all. My greyhound is a quiet couch potato. He loves kids. Although he doesn't roll over, lick you to death or fetch sticks, he is extremely BRIGHT. Honestly, he did that on purpose. I believe he was whimpering to go out and my STBXW ignored him or didn't hear him while she was watching her soaps or VH1 or some reality show.

First night of Chanukah went well. No friction of late, although, damn...she can't utter a damn thing without acid. Dinner got started late last night and we walked across the street to go home 'round 10. Last night:

Me: S8, you're going to have to wake up early to take a shower and D5 will need a bath since it's so late.

W: (appears around corner, in nasty tone) D5 can take a shower now..she's older....it's faster in the morning.

(wuh?)

Literally, nary a sentence comes out to me that is kind, sober, pleasant or inquisitive...except for when will I be coming home if she needs to be somewhere.

Multiple photos are showing up in the house of my W posing with the kids..hangin' on the fridge; on her dresser; etc, candid shots, professional shots. It's OK...I'll take mine for my new life AFTER I am gone. There is no need for this for me now. I KNOW I'm their dad.

These are OBSERVATIONS only...not 'whoa is me'. Me? For the first time in awhile, I was singing in the shower today. She...is back to gnawing on her nails.

Hope everyone is well.
FIB

[faithisbelieving]

To WCW....judges of character. What's that saying? Never trust a man/woman who doesn't love a dog?

To 25...more to post. Glad to see you again.

To BM...stay strong. You're doing OK and WILL be OK.

To Jack.....got it...I got it.

FIB

PS...my 'kids' bought me a new shirt and tie and a shirt from Abercrombie and Fitch. Why so much money?

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Man, those little nagging questions just suck and can toally consume you.

Sometimes its best not to dwell on them unless the circumstances that evoke the questions become the norm rather than the exception.

I like my answer to the question though...cause you're F-ing worth it.

Happy Chaunaka. I think I spelled it right. : )

[25yearsmlc]

FIB,

what Jack said! And have a good holiday. Your life is about to get better...okay, maybe a big bump or two remains, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Hey when are you giving us the actual best guess date for us to schedule our bi-coastal celebration of the end to the insanity for you? As in when you won't be under the same roof? I need to know how long to make my paper chain links...
j-

DIdn't say I gave up on your w. Just saying she NEEDS this d to get... whatever this is, out of her system. Meantime, you are living and moving on...FIB, I see such good things and people for you and yours in the future. Just wish you could fast forward, but it isn't so easy is it? Well, you of all people know that but just wanted to say, You are NOT alone!
((( j )))

[25yearsmlc]

FIB,

what Jack said! And have a good holiday. Your life is about to get better...okay, maybe a big bump or two remains, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Hey when are you giving us the actual best guess date for us to schedule our bi-coastal celebration of the end to the insanity for you? As in when you won't be under the same roof? I need to know how long to make my paper chain links...
j-

DIdn't say I gave up on your w. Just saying she NEEDS this d to get... whatever this is, out of her system. Meantime, you are living and moving on...FIB, I see such good things and people for you and yours in the future. Just wish you could fast forward, but it isn't so easy is it? Well, you of all people know that but just wanted to say, You are NOT alone!
((( j )))

[25yearsmlc]

FIB,

you alright? Sending good thoughts your way.
((j ))

[faithisbelieving]

I am alone tonite and will be again tomorrow. Alone BUT OK. A lot better this year.

Merry Christmas to all my friends without whom I would have been lost.

FIB

[25yearsmlc]

FIB,

((((( ))))) you are not alone tonight. We are with you. Next year will be better. I promise, I know this. You are a rare man of great worth and dignity and you will find yourself surrounded with family and friends who know this, and right now tonight, although we are not with you physically or geographically, we ARE supporting you in spirit and thought. Next year, you'll be holding a female's hand at this time, (even if it's your d's)...hey, things are going to get better for you...seriously.

((( j- )))

PS, semi-serious question about the Jewish holiday now. Okay, I get the 8 nights and 8 candles and hopefully 8 presents!...but it's a bit depressing to me (so is Good Friday for that matter, but then we have Easter --and all is well again!) So my question is about a happier holiday for my Jewish friends. Is there a holiday where you celebrate more than merely surviving and not getting slaughtered? Just wondering...