Is she is or is she ain't (my baby)?

[sleeper]

"What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun."

Ecclesiastes 1:9

Might as well find some part of my life I liked and do it again.

Hey, isn't that what our mlcers are doing?

[fisherman]

Haha!

Excellent!

Whatever you do Never ever lose that sense of humor!

[sleeper]

I went out on a date for the first time since D last night.

We ended up at a local bar frequented by a younger crowd, many of whom were there due to Christmas break from college. Interestingly there were also a few female divorcees in their mid-30's who had children there. I discovered this as my date is a member of that group and several come up to speak to her.

In some ways it was weird and I felt like I had gone over to the other side as my X described that very same scene (early 20's/late 30's) just post bomb when she started going out.

Here's a haha.

X called on my cell while I was out but I couldn't hear the ringtone for the loud music. She called more than once (not sure cause I wasn't wearing my glasses). The last call was at 10:30 PM. I didn't return her missed call as it was WAY past that when I got home. She probably wanted me to watch the kids for her as she worked today and I was off. I figured if she needed me badly she would call this AM. She didn't. OM needs to start carrying his weight anyway.

I may like trying on her lifestyle a little too much before this is over.

"Very powerful the Dark Side is." Yoda

[Andabelle]

Good for you, Sleeper.

[sleeper]

Here's one to make you scratch your head but I'm not wasting any more time on it than it takes to scratch mine once.

Friday (the same day I was out and missd X's calls), X added me as a friend on her Facebook page. I can't help but wonder why and why now?

I went there this AM thinking maybe there were pics of kids/kids and me she took at DD's Christmas program this week. The main pic on her page is one of her and OM whom she refers to as her "friend." There were some pics from a recent party she went to with him and a few previous pics of her with her new mlc friends from the past year or so. NO PICS OF THE KIDS AT ALL!

So what was that all about? Remember, the limit is one head scratch. I accepted her offer as a friend and my addition as a friend is the most recent activity on her page. The funny thing is her page is almost as boring as mine.

Could it be she wants to check out my page to see what I'm up to and needed to be a "friend" to do this?

Maybe I should go back and drop her.

On second thought maybe I should go to Playboy's website and down load some party pics.

[Bworl]

I don't think I would have added her as a friend Sleeper.

There are things you don't need to know about her, and she could stand a little bit of unknown when it comes to you.

[forward]

Sleeper, I know others would disagree, but it is OK to date, I think, so long as it does not become a situation where we hurt someone else, sigh. I have not dated but it is very tempting to do so. However, I do not feel ready to do so. I think I have more self-examination to do.

Remember that this is not about making her jealous! It is about you--well, all of us, growing.

[sleeper]

I would not date as long as we were legally maried no matter what X did. We haven't been intimate for two years, separate domiciles for 23 months and we've been divorced for 7 months (but who's counting?).

I'm at peace with dating now. Maybe that means I'm moving on with my life. I've had other opportunities to date but chose not to. One immediate benefit is that I no longer feel like I have put my life on hold for something that may never happen. That in itself is freeing and empowering.

I can't help but wonder what her reaction will be. You must understand she came to my apt and beat on me about 20 months ago because she believed I had gone on a date.

Tonight when she brought the kids to me for kidswap she warned me that OM was parked outside. I chuckled and said why? She responded, I didn't want you to get mad or anything (like I would still get mad after two years?).

It may be more interesting when MY date is waiting outside. Very interesting if it's the lady I went out with the other evening.

"She's a scrong (strong) woman." Percy Sledge

I will know I have arrived when X's reaction doesn't even cross my mind. The only reason it still does is because the financials have yet to be finalized and when she goes psycho that's one of the areas in which she threatens me.

I e-mailed my attorney Friday to bring that to a close asap.

[sleeper]

Observations of late:

Friday X called but I didn't answer as I was out on a date (last call 10:30 PM).

Also Friday she added me as a friend on facebook. I reciprocated and there is a pic of my first friend on my page who happens to be a very hot chick who is a citizen of a European nation and a coworker of mine.

Sunday X warned me OM was in car when she dropped kids off at my place cause she "didnt want me to be angry" (she's shoved him in my face almost two years now so why the sudden concern?) She did have some concern for my feelings in the very beginning but not for some time now as their R became commomplace.

I learned from kids that X bought me and OM the same xmas gift (although there are probably others they are unaware of).

I offered X more time than she requested with the kids Xmas eve and day, blew her away with my generosity and made her curious at the same time. While discussing holidays I told her there were some things I had planned some evenings and she asked, "Are you taking the kids with you?" Was she curious that I might have a date?

Enough of that, back to geting a life and having some fun.

New Year's Eve I plan on partying "Like it's 1999." I had 6 month old baby New Year's Eve 1999, stayed home and didn't party at all so I need to make up for that missed partying.

Sounds like I'm through with denial and moving on to justification myself.

[job]

Sleeper,
Take her comments w/a grain of salt. There is no rhyme or reason for her comments and questions. I do have to say, she's a bit curious as to what you are planning for the holidays. Let her stay that way.

Yes, it's time to move forward and allow your wife plenty of time to stew in her own juices. Keep the focus on you and your children and if you do happen to get the presents, definitely be sure to thank her.

Enjoy your holidays, even if you are making up for lost time.