My h is a real perfectionist and he expects me to be at that level like he is and I feel like such a failure at times.
GG, Perhaps he's a perfectionist because he realizes he's NOT perfect and it makes him feel better to criticise others.
You are not a failure at all. Like you said, you have SO much on your plate. Remember that not too long ago, he thanked you for holding the family together and that he's so grateful for that?
He still needs plenty of healing. Remember that he's still in his crisis. It takes time to get out of it. I still that you have made great strides, despite the recent letdown about not showing up on Christmas Day.
