Signs to say WAW woke up?

[dday101798]

Call bullsh*t or cut it loose.

What is it that you are really afraid of?

Call it out and deal with it.

Cut loose.

Affraid of never getting the real truth.

Now W says that she claims to have never loved me for the 10 year duration and the whole marriage was a lie. Meh, okee-doke.

Game continues to escalate with her throwing the kids in the middle. Now, when she goes on one her call/text rants and I simply shut the phone off, somwhere after about 4 to 5 nasty messages from her, I'll get a message from of my kids who supposidly wanted to talk to me while she's screaming at them "to leave your f'n father a f'n message".

It's not me playing in the gray area putting them at risk.

Oh, and the house was ran through again when I was out my company christmas party Friday night. Mainly the bedroom, of which she knows there is nothing of hers left in. Got to get the apartment plan in motion. The final 180* and the final stage to GAL. In 20 years of being 'on my own', I've NEVER had a palce of my own, always a room mate or something. Looking forward to this with great anticipation.

[dday101798]

Ah, she never ceases to amamze me.

Kids were home when I got back from work. Finally, W called ME versus 'house-mate' to send them over by her. Tries to tell me her alternating schedule for this week, which went completely in one ear and out the other, basically told her, just write it down and send it with them tomorrow. Oh, and she's dropping them off Friday night for my weekend AFTER they go to the one place I begged her to go when things were headed for certain doom, CHURCH!!!!!!!!!!! WTF!

Says she'll keep them overnight, OM will get them off to school. Heheh, good luck with that buddy, my boys are blast to get motivated in the morning.

So, i tell the boys to head over by "mom's". At this point my youngest tells me he got his friend suspended from school for fighting, my stance, mom wants to be the custodial parent, she can deal with it. My oldest left wearing a Cubs jacket my friend (female) gave him that she used to wear at work at Wrigley Field.

So, I tell my house-mate, wait a few minutes, I'll bet that phone is going be ringing about the fight and the jacket.

Low and behold, the phone rings. W is demanding I go and talk to the other kids parents. I tell her no, I have shopping to do, cleaning and laundry. You wnat to be the custodial parent, these are the things YOU will deal with, [saying in my head I am returning to the life of being nothing but a paycheck for you. My days as a drill sergeant are over.]

Then comes the coat, and I explain where it came from. This sends her into a frenzy that since he wears a boys size 14 that makes her a womens size 4-6. I say "so?". (W always had a size complex that I never gave her any flack about and always supported her, seems OM has told her she still needs to lose weight). So, more pointless jealousy. A friend gives my kid a coat, since the one W bought him this year was a total POS and the zipper broke in a day. Big deal, and why the jealousy? How can you be jealous when you've filed for divorce, taking me to the cleaners and, OH YEAH, already engaged?

[dday101798]

Haven't heard from STBX in days, kind of nice, but I imagine I will tonight. S11, apparently got on the rough side with 'house-mates' babysitter's daughter and she got hurt. Thus, as punishment for the crime and not saying why he did it, Me and S10 went out for the usual Wed. night dinner minus S11. That oughta spark some type of cruelty issue since there is actually a thing called discipline under my roof.

Also drafted and had reviewed my official notice to vacate the house letter for 2/1. Having it notarized tomorrow and sending it via certified letter Saturday to STBX and FIL. Really starting to cover my arse these days not knowing which way she'll turn. BIL finds it highly amusing that STBX still wishes to be 'engaged' to OM while he is knowingly cheating on HER. I said, that's no suprise, they do have a 'open relationship' you know. :lol:

Well, that's all I've got for now. Goin gto start packin gwhat little I'm taking this weekend.

[dday101798]

Wow, another night of zero contact, especially after a friend (so happning to be female) stopped at the house to pick up a set of rare christmas light I rewired for her for a nativity set for her and she got there before I did and the kids were still there. Usually this would invoke a "is that your new girlfirend?" call.

Good night all around, watched the Bear's game with some friends, pizza and beer. S11 brought his grades home, made the honor roll again (even published in the local paper), so proud of him. A friend did notice my face just drop when I saw STBX's signature on the report. I signed it as well.

Had a ackward moment this morning when waking s11 up for school, he immediately jumped up and hugged me and said "I'm going to miss you daddy." Not sure if he had some type of dream or what.

S10 said the other night at dinner that he didn't know what was going on since I "won't let mom take them out of state".

Not sure if the two statements are related or what?

Going forth with plan, notarizing notice of vacating today, making sure my cousin is still good with the idea of me staying for a bit to get finances together to retain atty and new funiture and apt. If so, sending letter certified tomorrow.

S11's statement this morning has really kicked up my intensity level several notches. This is going to get ugly. I'm becoming mor driven everyday to fight this and a lot of people are takin gnotice.

When STBX and FIL get my letter, I am not answering my phone in hopes of them leaving a bitter VM as I already have a ton of as evidence of her conduct toward me.

[dday101798]

Had to 'see' STBX last night, she claimed the car "locked itself" after she closed the door to warm it up last night so she needed my copy of the keys.

Me being a former certified technician and having torn the doors on the car apart before, I know the car does not have auto locking capability, but what ever.

STBX came in the house calling my name out asking where I was like it was any 'normal' day. Still had the same sad puppy dog type eyes that she can't hide her true feeling from me. No R or M conversation. Didn't get a thank you, kiss my a** or anything of the sort. Just that sad empty look. Might have to do with the fact that over the weekend I got a good amount of packing done so all my collectables in the basement bar were gone with nothing but barron shelves. That and they should have received my certified letter yesterday as well.

We had a 'unpleasent' phone conversation the other night when I had asked her one last time if I should send my letter to vacate certified or if she or FIL will sign my copy as received. She blew up on me me after asking me 'why are you doing all this legal stuff to me?' and I replied 'you say you're taking the kids away from me as well as demanding support, do you think I'm honestly going to take that laying down?'. So she started to hoot and holler and I hung up.

S10 reminded her of a injury I sustained on Sunday walking to the bowling alley and slipped on some ice, streched both hamstrings pretty well and dislocated my toe. She actually showed concern, pretty strange.

Had a weird dream of her last night sending e-mails begging me to take her back. Funny thing is most of my dreams about anything lately end up begin a deja vue moment in 'real' life. I still think it's going to come down to the eleventh hour on this, standing in court when she'll come around. That or when OM books after realizing what he's fully in for should they go forth with this "engagement".

On a positive, after all my diligent work to restore my credit after 10 years of her dragging it through the mud, I got approved for a car loan as I'll be needing one here in a month. That feels nice, especially seeing how stringent creditors are right now with the economy the way it is.

[dday101798]

heh,

So we (Chicago) got hit with this lovely weather overnight. I got up at 5am to prepare to clear the snow/ice/slush mess and waatch the news to see if schools were going to open or not.

As a courtesy, I text STBX asking her if she got to work ok. First time I've made initial contact in months.

We go back and forth a few times about how bad it is outside.

I get a VM from her as I'm clearing the sidewalks that the school's automated message system had called her to notify school had been cancelled and to please call her back.

So, when I was done with everything, I complied with the request and called, and she basically repeated the same thing as the message, and then kind of got under my skin a bit when she said "well, I just didn't want you sending them off to the bus stop and having them stand out there waiting for nothing". So, I firmly said that if I were to have sent them off I would have wen twith them to asses the situation as I had yet to see a single snow plow on the streets.

I apologized for getting a little worked up and just said that I'm a little more conciderate then I'm given credit for. She accepted and then asked if I was going to work or not. I said yes. This is where it gets atrange. She begins to beg and plead with me not to go saying the train will "de-rail or something, or you'll get hurt even more trying to walk out there". What's up with that?

Apparently her family is having Christmas dinner tomorrow, wonder what her answer will be for A) me not being there and B) who her "fiance" is if he goes, I imagine he will.

[dday101798]

So, given the recent 'peace' in communication I'm left wondering...

Would it be wrong of me ask what she intends to tell her family for the first holiday we aren't together?

[dday101798]

Well, so much for the "peace in communication".

When I got home there was a note from the sitter that S11 allegidly 'touched' her daughter inappropriately. When I I tried to talk to him about this, he buried himself in his 'shell' and ignored the issue awaiting STBX to come and wisk him away for the weekend.

Well, once again she goes through my house-mate to tell the kids she'll be there to get them in 5 minutes. So, I call her and start off by sayin ghtat once again, I am not pleased of her going through him and not me about the kids. Right off the bat she has a complete attitude, why, 'cause she's in the car out front with OM. So, when I ask her to stop trying to put on a show for him, she gets further testy and does not allow me to get a word in edgewise about problem with s11 for the day.

So, I hang up, and go out to the car and give her the note. Immediately she calls it b/s and where would he learn to do such a thing. Sinacism got the better of me and I leaned in the window to OM and said "I wonder where he'd learn that from" since seeing them the way the were in a public park full of kids, I can only imagine what goes on indoors.

Naturally that pissed her off pretty good. so, I apologized on Saturday in a text and asked what the kids wanat for xmas as I had to shop this weekend or else. She finally gave me a list, sanely.

Apparently she did in fact go to her family's xmas dinner, with OM.

Anyway, got my shopping done last night, very exensive, and got in the festive mood and put the tree up that I intended not to and wrapped the presents for them up.

She (OM actually) dropped the boys off at 6:15 this morning. They were acting very strangely and queit. S11 didn't even say hi when he came in. This left me no choice but to ask her what happened, and what did she tell her family. Of course, it's all 'my fault' and was not put in very nice format either to say the least.

So, it's back to the war of the worlds again. Whatever. Spent some time at my cousin's who I'm moving in with in February. Got a nice PMA boost from her reminding me of all the things I ahve done for my kids and family and that she would have never thought in a milion years my M would turn out this way. She told me to just keep myself together and do teh best I can for the kids and let STBX bury herself in her own problems. If STBX doesnt' realize what she gave up, someone else someday will.

[dday101798]

Well, STBX tried her damned to be the grich that stole christmas.

On Monday, last we "spoke" she made the holiday 'schedule' that she woul dpick the boys up Tuesday night and return them before bed on Wedsnday night.

Well, Wednesday night rolls around and no kids. Total complete waste of a Christmas eve I could of spent with family. So I finally work up the curoisity to ask what's going on with the boys and when execlty they will be "home". I have to repeat the message 3 times before I finally get the answer that I can go "f myself" and a laundry list of profane names, some farily original.

As tempted as I was to lash back, I refrained and just threatened to get the police involved if it continued.

WTF is that all about? Boys were finally 'dropped off' 9:15 x-mas morning.

FIL called yesterday morning to wish a merry christmas and wanted to know if we'd be home or not to drop off his gifts for the boys. Told him what transpired and he went ape in disbelief she did that and said he's had enough of her. Not sure what that all entails but his fuse has been getting shorter and shorter with her.

I even after all that was courtious enough to send her a picture of our S11 in pure heaven with his train set he wanted and got from me, surprise, no reply.

[dday101798]

Ok, need opinions here.

I finally received a pre-trial care package from a Father's right's atty on Friday (4 months after requesting )

According to them, the very worst thing I can do is move out of the children's primary residence. I understand the rationale behind this, but doing so financially binds me that I can't provide suitable conditions for the kids, too much of STBX's stuff in the way. Plus, doing so bars me from retaining a atty, what am I supposed to do?

AND, most importantnly, she comes in the house whenever she wants and rummages through everything. Last night I come to find the lockbox containing all vital inforation was taken, I call her and she admitts to it. What am I to do?