Hi Beth - You had mentioned that possibility of getting stronger and yet feeling sadness before...and I'm so glad you mentioned it again...I needed that reminder today.
I had come across that info about sad tears and toxins once before - and I sometimes feel there is some real truth to it - mostly because I just feel so very different after those kinds of tears just finally come out.
....... Here's a bit of journaling...
My wife was a bit different again tonight (she never called or emailed to check on the baby, btw...which I just can't make sense of) - anyway - tonight, whens he came by to pick up our baby, she didn't call from the car - she still backed into the carport and turned her car to face outward - but this time she actually came to the door and range the bell - she also called from the road to let me know that she was running late.
As she took our baby from my arms, she told me that she would email me tomorrow with the address of his pageant (I had consciously decided not to ask her about that address today - since she had already told me she would get it to me before...that was a 180 from me - not to remember for her). As she walked toward her car she paused and looked up at the sky, and then asked me if he had eaten anything today...and then I wished her a fine night, told baby that I loved him, and went inside.
Tonight, while I was at that Thursday night men's group, my W called to let me know that baby had diarrhea again tonight and that she school policy is that a baby has to be diarrhea free for 24 hours before going to school...I got this on voicemail, since I keep my ringer off while in the meetings...She left the message around 9.45 and asked me not to call her back tonight - but just to send her an email confirming that I can watch our baby again tomorrow...I wondered why she didn't just email me with that question...
So...she is calming down some...and I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing...staying out of her way - not pursuing her at all - and not stepping into any battles she tries to set up...
She also said that she would like to pick up baby from me tomorrow and take him to his pageant while I go pick up my S11...
that's all for now...I'm exhausted and feeling a bit under the weather...and I think I need some sleep in a serious way...
