Powerful coincidence, Rob...as it's been the same experience for me...Since she moved out last month I just have no anger in me at all - and the only time it bubbled up was when she pushed me and pushed me with the one thing I was still sensitive to - her accusing me of not caring about/loving my baby boy...other than that one moment, I've not stepped into her traps - though she does try to continue to set them.
My W was very effective as "gas lighting" me - when I go back and read my first threads here I can see just how much I took on responsibility for everything - and even believed that I was a verbally abusive husband...when I look at our situation now, I can see that I lost it when she dropped the bomb - that I did overreact then - but that outside of that time - and before it - I was not like that - I was mostly calm - hurt at times by her - and even angry with her - but not verbally abusive the way she insists I was...
With the distance we have now - and the quiet calm around me - I remember more of how she would interact with her father...and now I can see how I had stumbled so carelessly into playing his role...
Are you already on break? Or does that start on Friday for you? -Carlos.
