Its that time of year.....

[a new 2moro]

yes TL it is something, and maybe I shouldnt loose sight of that!

[WCW]

now i either want to live in a sexless marriage destroyed by an affair or i dont.

So true for me too.

While your H had his head in the sand hiding from messes did you normally fix it before he would surface again?

[a new 2moro]

well which messes?
He spent the euphoric stage in the affair running from our debt and spending $$ on his whore like no tomorrow. I did not get a job til he came home

hes still in denial as to how much he actually spent in that time as well as her upkeep after he came home for 8+ months. I only found out by snooping.

I think what ever keeps him from being intimate with me hes got his head stuck in the sand as well. He will look me in the eye and say hes back 100% and hes everything a husband should be......oooops.....that would be denial wouldnt it??????

[WCW]

He will look me in the eye and say hes back 100% and hes everything a husband should be

How do you respond to that? Maybe he really thinks so and you should offer your opinion of what a H should be. How was the intimacy before his ow?

[glamgirl]

Is MC covered by your insurance? I think the C would do you both some good. Let you get out what is on your mind and allow your h to express himself.

Thanks for all the advice with my own sitch. As you know, my h is not home yet, but hopefully we will get there soon.

Your h is home, I know that might not be much of a consolation prize when there is no sex, but that is why the C might help.


You are a beautiful woman. Not many would have stood by your h in crisis. Keep remembering that.

Happy Holiday!

[Valentine]

Sweets, I am sorry that you are still hung up by the affair...I know it is hard...

I will pray for you to move on from the affair in your heart...remember forgiveness is for YOU...and I think you need to forgive your H...he is with YOU not her...she was nothing. He LOVES you...

Just remember that sugar...

Hugs,
Valentine

[momof2girls]

Hi Patty,
My H left 12/14/06...a week before Christmas! I am sorry you are still hung up on your H's actions while he was having the A. I want to let you know that you are not alone.

H has been home for 1 1/2 years now and our M is good, really good BUT I still have flashbacks to those horrible months and sometimes I can't be intimate with H...it makes me feel like I am going to throw up!

this time of year is the hardest...last Sunday was 2 yrs post bomb and I am not proud of it, but I was a real b#tch in the days leading up to it...I was totally stressed and all those feelings of the day he left came rushing back.

I finally did tell him what was going on. I try not to dwell and talk about it all the time. We did have a good convo and I guess sometimes we just need that.

Your H is with you for a reason. He loves you! Do not put time constraints on your healing marriage unless they are for you. Only you know how long you want to go on the way things are going.

[Truelove]

Hi a new 2moro,
I would like to wish you merry Christmas and a happier and healthy New Year. Let's hope that your H will remember soon what being back 100% really means. Take care. (((HUGS)))

[a new 2moro]

I really had put most of this behind me....when he first came home i really did....i tried to not push and give him room to feel comfortable again.....only to find out 6 mos later and week after I lost OZ he was still bedding her on the side just in case things didnt work out here....

i picked those pieces of my shattered heart up again and it took another 6 months to get the heavy cow out of town. I understood the guilt etc....the lack of intamcy is fueled as the longer it goes on.

this fall as the one yr anniv of loosong OZ approached it just madde me so sad, sad my beloved horse is gone sad a yr later My H is in the same place......so the affair or those months after he came home and was still seeing her eat at me. That email I discovered eats at me......

I went card shopping and burst into tears as I realized none of those cards fot H's fit mine. As Angela said the innonence is gone from the M

he has 100 reasons why no C....no time ...no money blah blah..... and this time of year sux for me because of the daylight or lack there of!!!

[Valentine]

Patti, I understand...this is such a hard time of year for all of us...

The best you can do is ask God to help heal your wounded heart and to ask him to enter into your H's heart. Ask God to restore your M better than it was before...

Love you,chick and I hate that you are hurting like this...

Smooches!
Valentine