aliens undercover: married to the pod

[hoosiermama]

I had a couple of single-mom reality checks yesterday.

This is a busy week; D12 sings with a large (but really wonderful) children's choir, and there are several obligations this week--beginning at 4:30. Fortunately we have a carpool, and I was scheduled to drive yesterday because everyone else had family stuff. It was going to be a tight schedule since I can't leave work until 3:45. D was going to get her usual ride home, change clothes, I'd pick her up, pick up the other 3, then dash up to the north side of town--hopefully only making it a few minutes late. So I get a call at 7:55 am that her ride home from school fell thru--not an emergency, but a planned social event. Wow. So scramble for a new ride--hopefully by one of the moms of kids I'm driving later in the day. Nope, only had time to reach 2 before I got to work; I had an orthodontist appt, the other had another obligation. So--D12 goes to aftercare at school. I arrive to pick her up at 4--all the doors to school are locked. No one in the office to answer the entry bell. The other moms of kids I'm driving are there, frantic. We run to all the doors, pounding. Twenty minutes later someone lets us in. D12 is upset. The other girls are upset because they're going to be late--and even more upset when we go to our house for D12 to change into her choir uniform. (If I'd known even a little in advance, we'd have brought it to school to change.) So we get there half an hour late. They miss their photos--they're mad. I wait thru the dress rehearsal (of a program I won't be able to attend because I literally can't afford a ticket). Near the end, another school mom pops in to pickup her carpool kids. Tells me about the pizza special at the new pizza place, general flight of ideas, more manic chatter. How are things going? Lousy, I said. Didn't elaborate. Well, if you ever need anything....How about a ride home tomorrow for D12? Oops, I'm sorry--my car is full. But if I can ever do anything to help....

So then we drive home, 5 minutes later H arrives to pick up D for the night. I get to do the frantic running around, you see, he gets to have the fun.

I never wanted to be a single mom, and I'm not liking it much. I have no support system here; no sisters, aunts, parents, cousins. Ask for help from friends--and there is yesterday's scenario:very willing, rarely able, other things are usually a priority (like social events they could have told me about in advance but forgot). But they feel good because they've offered to help me out.