Making my own good karma!!

[Silent Chrleader]

Thank you, (((((BG))))).

I have been going back and forth with H today about logistics of the move and such. He is a million miles away from me and it just crushes my soul! He told me Monday night that if I really thought about it, I would realize that I really didn't love him either and haven't for a long time! (WTF?)

I know that's his way of "justifying". I just don't have it in me to "DB" right now. I want to just curl up and die. It will take a couple of weeks at least for the increase in medication to kick in. I'm hoping that will help.

I spent 4 hours last night working on budgets for each of us. Some would say that I shouldn't do that and just let him figure it out, but we had agreed that we wouldn't be deliberately hurtful, and through the past 6 months, while H has been in an apt, our finances have still been together and we have not begrudged each other anything. So, for me, it is the honorable thing to be very clear and straightforward and accomodating as much as possible on the practical stuff. I am an accountant and have done our bills for years. Now I have put it all in H's lap, but I've given him very clear instructions on what needs to happen. All of his "free" time will be working on getting the house fixed (fun!). I hope that gives him time to think and maybe come to his senses, but I don't think that will happen. He is very set in his ways.

I'm hoping that when I get into my own place, I'll be able to feel more compfortable and strong and able to pick up the pieces and move on. But, I have my doubts.

Oh, and I am in the alt universe, but I can't access it from my work computer. Will go on tonight and update my stuff with my number and such. Is your name the same on FB as here on DB?