just had to catch up with you. Of course you are angry. It is natural and you have been so not angry through all of this. Sandi gives great wisdom. I would like to add my 2cents though.
I was looking for Tomato's thread last night and accidentally clicked on the wrong forum. It was the surviving forum. I read a little bit over there and so much of it made so much sense it was almost scary. One of the threads was about our contribution to the D or at least the demise of the M. One thing I have learned here is that even though I didn't/don't want D, I too contributed to the breakdown of this M so even though I felt it was H's D, it really is mine too. Do your best to not allow it to get ugly. We all talk about boundaries etc.... but I think that unless you are going to get so screwed that you have to fight, or if the kids are possibly going into an abusive sitch, then there really is no reason for ugly D unless we still just want to hurt each other. Which then means that we aren't really "done". No this isn't the man you married. No this isn't how you ever expected him to treat your children, but is he really that bad or do you feel that way because he is doing something you don't want? This is a question I have had to ask myself as well.
Yes I agree with turning it over to God, but if you do that, then you have to do it totally and make it as smooth a transition as possible. You can handle this with grace just like you have handled the whole thing. If you allow yourself too.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
