There may be another parallel between you and I here in our choices of who we're attracted to. Keep in mind, I'm just going off of three examples (xBF, BMF, and your EA at work), but maybe you should talk w/ your C in your next session about seeking out "projects" or "fixer-uppers."
Again, it seems a bit parallel here b/c in my C sessions, I've come to realize I've been attracted to certain types of girls - ever since high school. I've always gone after girls I can "help" or somehow "fix."
My disfunctional upbringing caused me to seek out women that fit this bill b/c if I helped to "fix" them, then they'd always be there for me.
Now, I'm not pointing a finger at your family or upbringing, but maybe there is a pattern here for you to examine. Now I only say that b/c xBF is a mess (well-documented), you've stated BMF is one you'd never go for b/c "he needs IC" and the EA guy at work had his own issues.
Maybe there is something that attracts you to them/them to you, or both. Again, just a thought but I found it interesting in my own sitch to look back at EVERY girl I've either dated or had a "thing" for and hopelessly pursued and sure enough, they were all in need of their own IC - my XW included.
My patterns blinded me to this but now, if something starts to feel "familiar" w/ a woman, I put up the red flags. Familiar for me means latching on to another loon and that's no healthy way to go.
So, not sure what you think, but your line about BMF got me thinking there may be something to this that could be beneficial for you to explore. On the other hand, it could end up being a bunch of bunk and just more words of nonesense from ol' RTL.
