Finding my goodness and power

[faithisbelieving]

Wow..great post 25....will re-read again and again.

The statistics say that second marriages have a higher failure of divorce than first, but is that mostly for those that walked away and did not look deep within themselves as to their own faults?

I hope, like KerryK posts, that WE...the people that look inward and spend timing working on this...are in the 40%. That number looks much better.

To amyC..I think it was brilliant to bring in Kubler-Ross' stages. They indeed go hand in hand with any major stressor. Perhaps:

1) Denial: Holding onto hope for reconciliation; seeing signs of a PA or EA and ignoring them, choosing to focus on babysteps instead when none exist

2) Anger: Discovery; for men a feeling of emasculation; for women, being lied to and cheated on

3) Bargaining: GAL'ing; trying to change to win back our WAS's affections; promising them a new us

4) Depression: Realizing that they are gone, done and not coming around; that the bolt of lightening is not going to hit them one morning and we awake to "honey, I'm home"; that only a very small few will be rewarded with "the marriage you've always wanted"

5) Acceptance: Finally learning Dr. Gray's definition of detachment...that we are NOT lashed to the ONLY person who can give us love...that, in frank_d's words, "we'll be OK."

FIB