God grant me the patience and the strength...9

[theotherhalf]

Who in their right mind would continue to cling so tightly to a person who has made it a regular course of business to do things that broke their heart?

I ask myself this daily.

You had no business calling the man. None.

He is still my H.

The same state that he has been in for the past year or so. NOTHING has changed in him.

Your wrong. BUT still alot of the same.

Unfortunately you chose to read those signs as indicative of a man who might soon be choosing to come home. At the least you read them as signs of a man who was beginning to make good choices. And YOU, you began to apply expectations to him again.

Absolutely, because for the first time my H told me he was thinking things over. and that he was thinking about coming home.

But YOUR job was to be his lighthouse. Your job was to be immune to his lostness, to have understood he was lost, accepted that he was lost, and realize that the only thing that you could do for him was to be the ONE thing that he could always count on. You were to be that light that he could always find, should he ever regain his heart and mind and choose to begin making his way home.

How do I continue to be this for him but at the same time not allow him to disrespect me and use me Bill?