Another Christmas ... I used to think that I'd feel better if he'd just call me. I do feel a tiny bit better, but the heart ache is still there. He is going to spend Christmas with a friend and his family down on the Cape. I wanted to tell him 'what about me'...'do you think that all of this is about you, only'? What did I say to him ... 'oh that's nice 'A''...'I'm glad you will be with him and his family...so nice' Meanwhile, Christmas eve, I'll go home from work...cry and want to sleep most of Christmas day. I don't want to make plans because I'd rather be alone.
Meanwhile...I still can't eat right. My stress is sky high. I want to talk to him about my parents (they are not doing well). Their spirits and health are very low. I'm very worried about them. He told me about his mother needing an operation. I didn't even get to tell him that so does mine! So little time on the phone!!!! Very frustrating!!!
