It is what these guys do. They do it to stay away from us and the kids get hurt along the way. They will come around on their terms only. You can't do anything about it. Accept it even though it is wrong. Do not confront H about his behavior towards the kids, he will figure out a way to blame you and that will hurt.
Our kids harden to the ways they are neglected by the parent who walked away. It doesn't make it right but it is what happens. Someday they will have their own say with their Dad and they won't mince words. Their Dads will know exactly what they did to them. I am a firm believer in what goes around comes around. They risk losing their kids for good by neglecting and abandoning them. The sad part is right now they don't care because they live only for themselves in a very selfish, egotistical way.
My advice is let it be....
Your D is 18 let her figure out a way to contact her Dad, she will come up with something that will surprise you...leave it up to her...stay completely out of it. Be there to support your D, talk about it if she wants to. Do not bring up talking about it with her.
It will kill you to sit by and watch this, but it is part of the process our H's go through. To help you just keep the thought that it is H losing out and not you. You are the constant one in the kids lives and they will never forget the one who was always there for them and all you did for them. It will bring you all closer than you are now. One day H will be on the outside looking in and he will then have to face is choices and actions. Hopefully they will wake up to this sooner rather than later.
Keep taking your frustrations out here or with girlfriends... It's the best choice for now...
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
