Independence Day on the Lake Erie shore.....

[Neilh23]

The fact that a lot of what you are doing is orchestrated to get a response from her.

it is. not in a negative way though. I"m not completely ignoring her. i'm just choosing when and what to respond to. I know this woman pretty well, and i also know what to respond to.

Women who are hurting & desperate for a man's approval & acceptance, tend to respond to being ignored.

this is telling. i never thought of it that way. My W....many of our WAS's...isn't completely healthy.

So what's the long term goal Neil. Get her back, even if it's playing up her abandonment fears ? or.... get healthy with or without her ?

that right there is the problem for me. in the course of working with my IC, i started to see how unhealthy a relationship my W and I had. Am i healthier now? yes. do i still want my W in a completely new R? Yes. hard to describe........

thanks SC....