For the text I was thinking of something along the lines of a great sexual experience in a location, so that you could mention the location and it would take him back to you. Although I'm struggling to think of anything in my own life that I could use as an example...
Hmm dumb idea (unless you can say I miss watching dvd's on the red lounge, or I was reminded of the sand at xyz beach.)
Umm I'm talking myself out of it. Its too tricky!
I do really like your idea of an exciting idea in Boston. I'd give that a go. Can you think of something fun to do that you could invite him to? If so do it! Now! Its a great idea. But darling don't be disappointed if he cant come. I get the sense that you were really really hanging out to see him. Dont take it personally if he cant get to see you.
And don't lose sight that you are in half way between stage 1: reduce tension, and stage 2: friendship. So be patient!! If anyone can be patient it is you!
But be careful you do go to 'matey' best friend-ish. I think that's the safe option for you, and in my very very humble opinion I think you sell yourself short. You are an alluring woman, with sexual appeal - so work that angle too!
It was great to talk to you last night! Here is the list of schools I thought C might enjoy...I'd be happy to brainstorm a list of some summer programs or study abroad programs if you think that would be helpful. *alternatively*, I can grab my grappling hook and we can put Operation Rescue C into effect! (where did I park my helicopter...?)
TRANSFORMER
And then I put a list of schools with hyperlinks to each one's music department. The Operation Rescue C is a reference to a joke we made at the end of the conversation that we could just use a SWAT team to rescue his brother from his college and airlift him to the east coast by helicopter.
Essie, that makes a lot more sense now that you mention a specific location. I'm not sure how to pull it off either though, without it coming totally out of left field for him. I'm glad you liked my boston idea, I thought it might be just too crazy and it probably is a bit of a squeeze... I'll do some research though. I think I'll tell him when I call him on ... Monday (??) that I'll be in boston the next few days, even if I can't think of something irresistable to do. But that doesn't give him a lot of time to make plans...?? You are right, I am really hoping to see him, but even with my schedule it is unlikely... I get in tuesday afternoon, I have an appointment to get my cello worked on wednesday afternoon... so he'd either have to see me the day I got in, probably not that many hours before he'd have to get back on a bus to maine? Or meet me in the morning of the 17th before I leave for my cello appointment? It is starting to sound impossible!!
I can see what you mean about the best friends thing. I feel so much more comfortable being flirtatious in person. I feel comfortable being flirtatious over the phone when it's in the context of a committed relationship. But I feel totally clueless about radiating sex appeal from such a distance when I have NFC what he thinks about all this.
I also see what you mean about being halfway between stage 1 and stage 2. I think for so long I was really focused on changing myself and figuring out how I had contributed to the crisis. But more recently, part of me has been like, "Sh!t, girl! What he did to you was really, really terrible, immature, controlling, disrespectful. Why are you working so hard for someone who treated you like garbage?" So I have some of my own anger that I am still letting go of. I guess I'm just wondering... we've been in this "contact mode" for eight months. Is it like, another, four years before we get to friendsip? I guess there is no way to predict.
I sent him a text with crazy eyeballs picture ali recommended and a message, "Have a good flight! I hope your eyeballs feel as fresh as these when you wake up."
I actually figured out how to get a picture from the computer into my phone. I feel so accomplished!! I hope I am not "over-contacting" him because I did send him an email with a list of schools for his brother yesterday. But he did call me the day before!! I think I will call him on... monday (??) to talk to him about my confusion about my future. Kind of weird because it's also the day of my graduation? It's either that or in the airport on tuesday or while I'm running around Boston on Wednesday.
I just got off the phone with a friend who I'm visiting in Boston next week, and this was in my inbox:
Transformer,
Thanks for the text! I just bought new glasses (vintage 70s tortoise shell frames) so my eyes can take it easy... ahhh...
Also, thanks for the "rescue" list. I realized that I should have been jotting down notes when we were chatting, so I apologize if it came off as a little rude. I'll be sending your ideas off to CXXXX and i'm sure he will appreciate them very much.
Talk to you soon! B
Wow, he got back to me in 20 minutes? Not sure why he emailed instead of texted... maybe because he had more to type? It is funny that he apologized for not taking notes on my suggestions. The other day when I talked to him about all the different schools his brother might want to transfer to, B asked if I could email him a list after I'd talked about all the different schools, and I teased him, "What?! You mean you haven't been taking detailed notes this whole time?!" And he said something apologetic and I said, smiling, "I'm just teasing you." Funny because I was taking detailed notes when B was telling me about his brother... I am a crazy notetaker!!!
I guess I wait until next week, and then give him a call? Unless he gets contacts me first?
This is a lot of contact. I can't tell from the tone of the email if he is feeling positive about it or if he is just responding to me because I emailed him and then texted him the next day.
It's official!! I am graduating! I am finished with grad school!
I did a really good job on my piano final... I was SOOOOO nervous I was sort of shaking, but I just tried to stay cool and recover when I flubbed something. I am finished!!!!
Wow T !!!! If you guys get back together, I just KNOW its cos of that damn funny eyeball pic! Ha...
Well done for graduating !!! Yes.. keep up the contact and maybe leave him a voicemail saying how excited you are to pass at last!? I am sure he will be thrilled/proud that you did.
I am so happy for you.. to think you once had a key sent to you with NO note.. now the man emails you like 20 minutes after you contact him....
You are defo reeling him in! I am telling you, he is a trout.
Ok.. lets not get ahead of ourselves and overexcited, but it is positive that you two are reestablishing such a positive rapport and as I said before, so many ex's just lose contact altogether.
Love Al xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
(((K)))), I love your attitude, I will remember it when I feel lost!! Back to business!!!
(((((Ali)))) I LOVED the eyeball picture so much. HTF did you find that?? I hope he laughed anywhere near as hard as I did!! Just for the record, when he sent me the key it *did* come with a short note. If he hadn't included the note I might have been so hurt I could have said, "Sayonara, F#$@er!!" Instead I thought, hm, maybe he is trying to get my attention.
Man, I feel like I need a vacation. Something really extravagant and joyous!!! Why did I just buy my plane tickets to spend a month on the east coast? I feel like I should go to Bali or something to celebrate and rejuvenate!!
The sun is setting behind my back. beautiful. it stopped raining. I'm not normally home at sunset... the sky is turning purple and gold....
You really think I should call him and tell him I'm finished? Should I do it today, or wait? I was going to wait ... ??? I am so afraid to bombard him with too much loving energy!
