I think you are absolutely right on all counts. Just this morning she had an awful attitude the minute she walked in the door. Nothing has happened, and I'm beginning to realize that nothing needs to happen--she's just constantly angry. I'm not going to try to do what's right by her anymore, I'm only going to do what I know is right by me and God. I've given her way to much of my power, and I must stop. The only hang up I still have is that I do feel guilty for discussing our issues with so many family members and friends. I did because I really needed to gain perspective--I had a real hard time figuring out if she was cheating on me, and the more I would share my story the more people would say they thought she was, the more they say that the further into denial I went and began seeking someone who would say otherwise (which never happened). Anyhow, she's very very angry and hurt by that, and while she started all of this, I still feel bad for having done that. Do I need to even worry about that? I do want her to know that I wish I hadn't have spoken to so many people, but she won't believe me. Why am I so guilt ridden over that???
