Another Wife Hit By The Bomb #4

[Tawnya]

{{{Sandi}}} First of all..yeah..you can't say you are sorry..LOL Second of all, I appreciate you saying these things and taking the time to post them to me..it means a lot to me that you care so much

I am horrible with the quote boxes..so I will try to answer you without em

When you said that about asking my hub not to yell or be mad, I felt like I really DID this (maybe for the first time) when I was talking to him the other night, when I said "are you done because I want you to get it all out now cause I don't want to be yelled at home"..now..granted..the BEST case scenario that I will get to will be to stop the yelling/freaking out right off and/or hang up..but..you are right and it did feel GOOD to kind of empower myself (afterwards I was like, "who said that?" LOL)

I've always felt "badly" for hub because he does come across overbearing, some of it is "confidence" and some of it is an "I don't care what people think about me" attitude..tho, in all honesty, I know it's a wall he's put up to attempt from keep getting hurt, tho, we all know, that if you put up a wall, you are the one stuck inside alone..because, at the times the wall was down, he DOES care and he DOES get hurt..which of course makes the wall go up even further..

He had some close friends, less now that this OW sitch is going on (you know the secretiveness of it all), he does get mad about work a lot and does seem to have bad things happen to him (which I hate for him because he is INSIDE so good and kind (really I promise LOL) and would honestly give you the shirt off his back), he can be a sore loser YES, and he treated me well in front of people, in all honesty that's why my friends can't believe this is happening, because he would talk so sweetly about me and we would be good together, even over the summer..but I know that's not what you asked Umm..he CAN be a jerk to someone if they have mistreated him, men included, but not normally..I am sure that I am the one that is the "closest" that gets the brunt of his stuff..

Thank you for being open enough to share about how you treated someone..the GREAT thing is that you learned from it and probably wouldn't ever do it again..and look at all of the people you have helped and taken under your wing..so look at the good that has come from that after all You know, in a class at church once I learned something similar to what you are saying: I had/still do to a lesser point a problem feeling rejected/low self worth and I actually learned that we EXUDE a "reject me vibe" so to speak or a "hey, I am confident vibe" and so I was actually pushing people away, not even knowing it..isn't that something?

Yes..I so often say that the guys on here are AMAZING beyond belief and they rock!! The way they stand for their marriage, come on here looking for advice, admitting they were WRONG (WOW j/k), and loving and looking after their children so much just blows me away!

THANK you Sandi

Tawnya