Detach>Worse>Weird>Better ???

[Sophie]

I hate to break it to you, but....get use to the inlaws acting like they have their heads in the sand. They are hoping that if they don't have to acknowledge the situation, it will go away. Blood is thicker than water and do not expect them to extend themselves to you. They do not want to take sides and are stepping far, far away from this.

I feel like I am a robot...or a statue with no feelings, emotions, or life around them. I can't stand it anymore. They not only fail to acknowledge MY life...they don't acknowledge their son's life either.

I understand they are uncomfortable with what their son has decided and do not like it at all...but, it feel like they are looking to me, depending on me to hold out for him to 'find himself'...this has been suggested to me by both MIL and FIL. I'm just tired of being a ROBOT.

Settlement agreement in my state is a separation agreement which specifically states what each party is responsible for and how the property will be divided up if a divorce takes place. I don't know what your state does in the way a separation agreement

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Huge question here....so this is a seperation agreement versus divorce papers??? VA has two options...divorce or limited divorce. limited divorce is what those in other states call legal seperation.

You don't have to go into detail, nor do you need to pretend that everything is okay. You are going to have days when you feel like heck and do not want to be the happy camper. That's okay.

The only people I do feel able to be anything other than a cold stoned unemotional statue is H and his family.

I have the energy to be 'ok and 'as if' around H. But, his parents are wearing me out.

H's mom planned a xmas present to a play 4 hours from here, for the grandkids (there are 5..my 3 and 2 other cousins)...and any adult that wants to go....but, she planned it on a day her son and daughter probably won't be able to get off work to go.

That leaves me to help babysit and feel nothing...and I don't want to go. I will to keep peace and not appear snotty...and I'll enjoy the play....but, I really don't want to go.

I am always doing stuff with MIL and the kids. H does NOTHING with his family and our kids.

I guess they, and maybe H, are in DENIAL.

snodderly...I really appreciate your thoughts, especially tonight...I'm afraid my L is urging something that I don't really want.

I'm afraid my L is going to make my H mad. H does stupid things when he gets mad.