Hi ACJ, MWG and nlt, Thanks for your advice. I had to send H an e-mail regarding something else but did not reply to his e-mail. I just thanked him for it.
I guess you are right - I will just ignore it and see whether he will mention it again.
I guess the e-mail is manipulative but I can't imagine what he wants as everything is settled at the moment.
Journaling: I had a nice week-end and went to a few events: Christmas carols and a Dixy concert. I also met a friend.
Today was a beautiful day and I went for a long walk in the sun. Tomorrow I will go with my sisters to my niece to celebrate her daugther's birthday.
I ignored H's e-mail regarding staying friends, etc. so far. He replied to my e-mail in a normal way, but did not mention anything regarding friends anymore. I had to contact him about something else and have not heard from him yet.
I had a bit of a down time lately. I guess the holiday time is affecting me as well. I still miss my old H very much. I don't know how I will ever be able to live without thinking of him. I was watching something on TV and the scenery was just like somewhere H and I spent a lot of time. There is always something somewhere which reminds me of H. Even when I go to the theatre there is always something which triggers my thoughts of H!
Will I ever be able to live without having constant memories of H?????
Will I ever be able to live without having constant memories of H?????
It is very early days for you and right now those memories bring you pain in time they will be just that- memories. It is good you are getting ou and about and this is an especially hard time of the year for many if not all of us,even those far removed from the rawness. Be kind to yourself and don't expect to much from yourself. It will and does get better after each First has passed. Take care.
True, There will come a time that you'll look back on those memories and they will not hurt the way that they do right now. The pain will fade in time.
It sounds like you've been quite busy today. The holiday season is almost upon us again. Where did the year go?
Enjoy the rest of your week.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thank you for stopping by my thread. I feel the same way you do!! I can't go anywhere or do anything without thinking about my H. This town has grown so much since I've been here, my H & I were a part of all the growth. We did everything together. It is very painful & I do know how you feel.
Thank you for your posts. It means a lot to me that you write some comforting words when I need them. I have felt a bit happier the last few days.
H replied to my recent e-mail in a friendly way. He also wrote that he could do without all "this stuff" and guessed I could do without it as well! (Oh yes, I certainly could do without the D!!!) He called me by my pet name again and signed off with "love, H" (he has not done that for some time).
The birthday party at my niece's was lovely. I finally saw the new addition (baby boy) and met her partner's family and some friends. We eat so many cakes and biscuits that I must have put on some weight again. So I am cutting down on dinner during the next few days.
It started to snow again yesterday evening, just when I had to drive home. I managed to get home on wet but not icy roads. This morning everything was white and it is still snowing. Hopefully, it will rain tomorrow like it was announced on the weather forecast today, so that I don’t have to clear the snow off my path. The snow plough just blocked the access to my house and if it does not rain I will have to clear off a pile of snow before I can drive off. If the snow is very wet it is strenuous and tiring. The landscape looks pretty thought. The trees look like covered in icing sugar. - This is just the beginning of winter! I must find somewhere warm to go to soon because I really don't want to spend winter here.
Hi Cinders, Since you don't have your own thread anymore, I would like to tell you on mine that I am sorry to hear that you are so much in pain. I feel for you and hope that you will get out of this down feeling soon. Take your time to heal. I wish you all the best. (((HUGS))) xxx
Hey sweety... ((((hugs)))) glad you're doing a bit better. Weird how they start their old habbits of saying pet names and signing off with 'love' isn't it ?!
I'm tired and emotionally exhausted, but I will be fine. It's time to just think about Cinders and let H be.
Sending you love and kisses xxx
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
