Ok Laura, just for you. I put this on another's thread. They said it should be stickied somewhere..I don't know about that but It's my recipe for an LBS not to become a WAS..
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That's exactly it, Mike... a tightrope...and being a tightrope walker isn't something a lot of us have ever prepared for...it's scary and confusing - and sometimes there are those gusts of wind that distract us from focusing on the safe ledge at the other end.
yep..it's a tight rope..you can either ride out the gusts or just step off.
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How does one keep from becoming a walk-away? I'm struggling with that one myself...
boy..this one is a hard one for me to tackle.. 1. Forgive yourself- 2. forgive them 3. no matter what they say or do focus on the good whether it is good they do now or good they have done. Focus on something they do that is positive. 4. never lose sight of the goal you set, whether it be reconciliation or making it through the day.. 5. IC-it's a must..this place is an awesome place but you need an IC you can talk to. 6. a strong will to succeed and a duck's back. 7. patience-more than you thought possible, more than you knew was in you. 8. The ability to never give up when all around you(family and friends) are begging you to quit. 9. never finding another shoulder to lean on through this..once you do, it's very easy to move on..IMO. 10. Luck- you better be a lucky bastid..because no matter how much you change luck plays a part..
and with that..I'm done..I'm sure there are more..
detachment is the best thing in the world and it's the worst thing in the world..it's an enigma wrapped in a riddle..and it's exactly like walking a tightrope..one wrong step and you're out of the game..as long as you stay balanced you're still in it..
So Laura..it may be your worst fear verbalized but let's truly ask, would you rather live in more of the same?? Or be happy even if it meant moving on, even if it meant losing what you know as "family"
thanks..well for what it's worth I did that stuff routinely for Kim..flowers just to send them. Lipstick on the mirror for her to find before work..I once made a CD of songs played at our wedding along with a dozen red roses and left them outside her office door where she works..
HOLY COW MAN!!!!!! I'm melting into a puddle just thinking about a man doing even one of those things for me. Never in my wildest dreams. WOW!
I love what you posted to Laura. Too true.
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would you rather live in more of the same?? Or be happy even if it meant moving on, even if it meant losing what you know as "family"
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
When I proposed to her I did it in my apartment, in my dimly light bedroom..candles everywhere and real rose petals on the bed..
Hey I did 8 years of just that..hidden cards..letters, made CD's..lipstick on the mirrors..flowers..you name it..I did it..the child issue did us in..waffling on the vas. reversal was just too much for her I assume..
Jeez Mikey, with all that extra PMA, could'ya send a little over my way, please? Day three of the Mega Pity Party, with no end in sight. Peace. p.s. Glad to hear you had a fun date.
We will let you train them for us when they come home.
LOL..it will be too late then..these guys are not smart enough to snap out of it any time soon..wonder what happens when they wait too late and the roles reverse and all these fine ladies WALK??
I received a text from her around 3:45 as they were delivered..
it was OMG!!! these are so pretty!!! I'm speechless..thank you so much. U put a smile on my face..
then I got a phone call..thanking me again. I could hear people in the background talking about them. She said they were beautiful. She thanked me again and said I was awesome.. I told her I hoped she got many days enjoyment from them and that I hoped it brightened her day. I thanked her for going with me and told her she was welcome for the flowers and that she deserved them..
