Hey Jayce - No problem on the misspell, the search engines suggest the correct spelling so I found it anyway. Very interesting stuff. I'll add "Sex on the Brain" to my already long reading list. I just got "The New Male Sexuality" ($7 used hard cover) and started reading it. Still reading M/V and SSM too.
Actually I am doing something very different already. I haven't initiated in over 3 weeks now and I can sense that she knows something is up. Last night she was touching my back without response from me again. No response because I am feeling very withdrawn and disconnected from her now. I haven't been giving her greeting hugs and kisses either.
Giving the reins to her allows her to get exactly what she wants: No sex at all and a friendly platonic relationship devoid of any kind of passion or true connection. Just a few pats on the back and smacking kisses once in a while. Sorry, not the way I want to live anymore, that's not living at all to me.
The tables have turned on her not because I'm hoping that she will finally come around to see how to truly live. I'm now hoping that she will release me and see that we are hopelessly bound to one another in a relationship that really won't ever move past this deadlock we have been in for about 17 years. Instead of growing we are just stuck. I'm now ready to move past this point. She would be content to live out the rest of her life as we are now.
I love this woman dearly, but there is just something missing between us, that true connection. I am just a convenience to her but I am not her lover. At this point I don't want to be anyway.
I'm just trying to let go now.
Jayce, I'm glad to hear that you are at least making some progress now. If he is enjoying this now, that's great. You may just get up to that 2-3 times a week.
