What an interesting discussion on your thread! I personally think that your h is displaying classic WAH possibly with a dash of MLC, but the difference is that you are at home and having to experence it directly and more intensely. I think that my h would be pretty much the same with me if we were both living together. He is like that in his texts/ emails with me (i.e. the keeping me at arms distance) but because you and your h spend more time together he is going to fluctuate more between the closeness and distance. IMO this is going to take time to work on and we can def think of some solution orientated goals here. Maybe see if you can work out if there are any triggers, or if there aren't you may just have to work on coping tactics, for now. But then again you seem to be doing that really well.
Yes, you shouldn't have to put up with the behaviour but none of us should really. I don't think it will help your sitch if you start voicing boundaries now as he will push against you. Have you read the 'Getting through to the man you love' book by MWD, there is some really handy hints in there. Your marriage is in a fragile state at the moment and I think you are doing well. Keep GALing. I'm so pleased that you intergrated again so well after Poland.
