Tom--This is a landmark post for me! Number 1,000! Hard to believe I've had something to post a thousand different times. Anyway, it had to go somewhere so I am parking it on your thread my friend! LOL!
I'm glad you agreed with Mike and even suggested his "list of ten" post was worthy of stickiness. I agree! Cheers to Mike from TN! You have to forgive yourself first, I think it all gets easier after that!
LE
M42 S12/D9 T17/M12 Bomb 1 3/22/06 Bomb 2 7/11/08 Bomb 3 7/31/08 W Filed 8/1/08 D granted 12/17/08 D Finalized 1/29/09
A man who compromises his principles never had them in the first place.
I had a minor interaction with the W today; she sent me a text asking for the rest of the money that I owed her. She wanted to know if I would drop it by work. I ignored her request. Eventually she called me at work and inquired if I had gotten her text. I told her that I had and that I would go by and drop off her money on my way home. She told me to call her cell when I got in the parking lot.
So I'm there and she doesn't answer her phone. I called twice. I sent her text; now I'm running out of time to get the kids. So I call inside; one of her co-workers answered. I know that OM has been visiting her there from her mother (she works there too). So I made sure that I mentioned that this is Tom, her husband; is she there? I'd like her co-workers to at least question her. Don't know if they care or not; but I wanted to put that out there.
She came out, I handed her the money and she was just getting ready to say something as I told her "goodbye, I'll see you tomorrow night." Then I left.
a few minutes later she texted me to say that she JUST got my text that said I was out in the parking lot. She made an inane comment about "so much for the good in texting." I just replied, "yea, it isn't that efficient."
Then on my way home, in awful traffic, my boy was the last one there; I started feeling bitter towards her. And me, with all the work to do around the house, the financial stuff to take care of, the kids to take care of, just found out from the realtor about a broken window on my house in OH. I started feeling overwhelmed. Then I thought of how my kids depend on me and I'll just suck it up and do what I have to do. But it just makes me bitter that she gets to do whatever, with whomever; like she's entitled. Somehow, it steels my resolve to continue on and, so, I left my pity party with more determination to see this through. I just hope she realizes that she is going to have some financial obligations I'll not let her out of.
That's all...had to get that out here before tomorrow night. I'm dreading it; cause I don't like her in the house at all right now. Think I'll start packing her stuff this weekend.
I just two more texts saying one thanking me for stopping by and bringing her the money. The next telling me that she will not be able to pay me her half of the toy I'm buying for Eli until next week; because of her cell phone bill and an oil change for the car.
Hey Amy, feeling much better today. Thank you! Not bitter today; I guess the sleep pushed it out.
Journal....
So I kinda opened up a can of worms last night. I mentioned something to my S that soon we're going to be living differently in the house. He asked what that meant? I told him that we weren't going to be living in clutter in our bedrooms anymore. He suggested getting a bigger house. LOL! Not hardly..
I told him that I couldn't afford a bigger house and since it was just me, him, and his sister; that this one was big enough. Then he floored me with this; "What about Mommy?" I replied that "you remember, mommy said that she was getting an apartment." He countered with "When is Mommy going to come back to us?" I just sat there for second to gather my thoughts, "I don't know that she is; besides you'll be able to go visit her there." S says, "Well, we could move to a different state and then Mommy would have to move with us because it would be too far to drive to her apartment." My only response was a question, "you would have to change schools; do you want to change schools?" He took a dozen seconds and shook his head and said, "Nah."
I kissed his forehead goodnight and he went to sleep. That W of mine is so naive if she thinks that D doesn't hurt the kids. I'm debating internally on whether or not I tell her about this exchange.
To be honest it probably wouldn't even phase her. Sorry. Just keep being the best parent that you know how. I promise kids notice. You read my quick story on Jeff's thread. Really 42 years later, I am so glad my dad was who got me/us. I am not saying things were peaches and cream at home growing up but as an adult, I can see what was best all around.
Hugs.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
