Well I am feeling better now. I did a 3 mile walk/jog earlier and it helped mellow me out a little bit. I am still stressed and questioning things a little bit but I am hoping something will work out soon.
My hubby finally got ahold of the right person for this whole enlistment money and he felt good about the conversation. We will know more tomorrow when my hubby gets a call back.
We also talked about this job he applied for. I told him that the only reason I ask so many questions is because I love him and want him to be happy and he said "I know" so that is good. At least he is not viewing my concerns as naggy and controlling.
I just think we are both insanely young and that this is the normal time for people to search out the future and find the right path. I get so cart before the horse because we have already been married for nearly 3 years. And if we were 30 or something it would make sense for me to get this crazy about not having a plan. But at 22 I think we are just where we are supposed to be. I am just itching to live together again and get out of my parents and be more independent. I really can't wait, but it looks like I am going to have to.
Sigh.
If we can get this enlistment thing sorted out in the next day or two I will feel 1000x's better about life in general. At least we will be able to pay bills and buy Christmas gifts. Then my concern would shift to making sure we do not spend it all on bills and living expenses. That we stick to the plan of spending and saving it we have already made.
I just need to remember to tell him how all of this makes me feel and not just lash out in frustration which would come across as naggy and bitchy. He has been very understanding this far and knows what he needs to do. I guess that is half the battle right there.
Overall I need to just be thankful that we are back together in time for the holidays (per my goals from earlier this year) and that we are happy, flirty, and commited to the marriage lasting the rest of our lives.
