It was really uncomfortable for me and my H too if that is any comfort. He had changed and so did I. We needed to reconnect. It happened but it took a long time before we felt comfortable around each other. I was always afraid to say something that he would take the wrong way and send him running again.
Let your H go back to IC if that is what he feels is best for now. I think it is better that he works on himself before working on the R. Sometimes when they go to MC they can't be honest with themselves and can be more open in IC. At least he is in C!
Take the pressure away from your H. Don't talk about the R or M for a while unless he brings it up.
Another thing, MLCers tend to hide their depression really well around everyone and even their C. My H did too and finally it became too much and everyone, I mean everyone saw what I saw. It will come out.
