Sorry Cinders that life seems to be a bit more than you can bare at the moment. I think the holidays put so much undue stress on us.
I just think that your body just gives way at some point and what we carried all bottled up inside has to come out some how.
I remember in Jan last year we put our beloved dog to sleep. I had to manage this all on my own. No h around to help. It felt like everything inside just came pouring out. I felt the loss of everything in my life. I was sobbing uncontrollably at the vet. I am sure that I would not have taken that as hard as I did, but my whole life came pouring out in my tears.
This is what could have happened to you with the tree.
Take the break that you need. We are all thinking of you and know that we are here for you.
God bless!
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"