I realize that my perspective on things is very microscopic at the moment and the "this too shall pass" mentality is somewhere in my arsenal (if I only knew where), but this w/e went down kind of like drinking a nice cold (and the cold part can easily be had around these parts at the moment)glass of wikedly sharp fragments of glass. Or perhaps that would have been a welcome beverage.
Just trying to keep somewhere in the same continent of my objective. Just trying to epoxy myself to my great and loving Lord. Just not seeing it that way right about.
Feed me some cool-aid. Don't much care what it might be laced with. I am in the grips of something far greater than I (is that you Lord?). It rather feels like an alligators teeth around my neck.
The question that just popped into my head is ....."If I would have known how brutal being M'd (even for this short little while) was going to be ahead of time, would I still have chosen to exchange vows?
Things that make you go HHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmm!
If nothing else it is a musical day. That has always been my MO, when I get knocked a$$ over tea kettle by the matrimonial mess. I become one with my comfy chair as I push the decibels of the home entertainment system to new extremes. The simulated concert hall experience with RUSH providing the soundscape and pushing me further to deafness. Just want to block it all out. Pardon me while I repack the poor dog's ears with cotton or get her some ear protection. As I told her (the dog that is).. we don't need both of us to be deeeeeef.
Jesus where are ya. Cascade your Spirit upon me that I may carry on attempting to follow your ways infused with love.
