Cinders, You are starting to bottom out. We all go through it to some degree. You've held it together far longer than I did many years ago. While you are hitting bottom, everything looks like it is unraveling. Once at the bottom, you'll stay there for a period of time and everything will most likely look gray. Everything will appear to be in a negative manner, but w/time, you'll begin to pull yourself out of that pit and life will look new and brighter once again.
Honey, it's okay....it's all part of the journey towards healing. As for the tree, I'm w/your h, things happen and be thankful no one was hurt. The tree can be salvaged and redressed another day. If it's not perfect, so what.
Cinders, I'm very, very sorry you are going through this right now, but I promise you, it will get better.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
