The next stage, maybe

[AliSuddenly]

Hey Julia,
I'm so sorry you are ill, thank goodness he didnt want to meet up on the weekend!

I agree his text sounds annoyed (if you can tell from a text!) and I agree that is probably becuase you didnt just say, ok then, and sign the form. So he said this.. "There aren't really any implications of the payment holiday, other than we wouldn't have to pay any mortgage in that time"

Ok, true, there arent implications, he is right. As for you saying you dont want to do take the holiday, becuase it will come out of the eqyuity.. well, theres nothing to stop you still paying your portion of the INTEREST (as they dont give you a holiday from teh capital?? Unless you have an interest only mortgage anyway) into a separate account, as though you are still paying your half of the mortgage as normal. Then the money you get back will be the same when you sell, although its swings and rohndabouts hey. If he wants a payment holiday, then yes, his half of the equity would be reduced by his half of the unpaid interest, but that wouldnt effect you. If you get my drift!

So I dont see that its a valid argument to him as why you dont want to do it.. I think he wont agree.

.. I cant believe he said "hopefully the house would be sold by then." ..!!!

..Yes he's mad. You said its unlikely to sell, there are unsold houses in your street. Unless you have something that people are really looking for, near a good school for example, or you are prepared to sell it at a totally cut down price, I dont imagine you will sell within 8 months. The period Dec - Mar is usually slow anyway and this is the worst economic conditions for years. Is he insane!? I guess he wants to shed the responsibility of it? Can you buy him out?

..I like your other idea - to rent out the house and move out until the market changes. Are you armed with info for your meeting on rental income versus mortgage payments? I wonder what he would say though to the idea.. so, we take a mortgage holiday and the house STILL doesnt sell by next summer.. then what??

The top is nice! I agree you want to look good. At least you will get to see him at last.. are you nervous??

You said "should I just not try to engage him, make him work for it in some way - am I in a position to do that? " - No, I dont think you are anymore Julia, hes kind of emotionally not available I think. I would be accepting, be his friend? Keep it light, neutral? I did that for 3 1/2 hours and then lost it at the last hurdle and got upset (hey ho, I'm only human!) so who am I to advise!! Ask Lisa about how to act :-)

Al xxx