I think that we all need to be reminded that there is a clear LINE between offering advice, even administering the occasional loving 2x4, and just plain being mean-spirited.
That line is getting crossed repeatedly in the last couple days on this thread.
We all need to remind ourselves that we are basing our impressions of another's situation on what we have read here only. We are NOT where they are SEEING what they see. More importantly, we have NOT lived their life with them.
None of us should be so arrogant as to classify another person's life based on the crap they are currently going through.
an2m, I recall when your husband came home. He would NOT be intimate with you, he continue sleeping with his OW, and he would not remove her from his rental property. While I remember lots of people encouraging you towards certain responses, I don't remember ANYONE telling you that you were treating yourself like a whore by allowing him to stay.
Those kinds of remarks simply cross the line.
Say what you have to say, offer your advice, but leave the judgemental remarks in your head. No one who is going through a mess like we have all gone through needs to come HERE, our place of SAFETY, and get verbally bashed on a regular basis.
Just MY humble opinion.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
