Maybe I should be in piecing part 4?

[sandi2]

Ok, here's my one allowed post today

Come on now.....I don't believe that is what was said.

[Hope4us]

Ok, here's my one allowed post today

Come on now.....I don't believe that is what was said.

Come on now, that was a joke, that's why I put the smiley face.

I really just got busy with work right after that yesterday and was busy all this morning and most of the afternoon.

But I took what BA was saying to heart. A couple months ago I had done a good job of detaching from the sitch and GAL and then we went on vacation and CONNECTED and when we got back and she pulled back, it threw me for a loop.

And since that time, as I've felt myself approaching WAS status myself, I have been posting more. And yesterday I was really considering throwing in the towel so I was venting here.

I decided last night that I needed to stop posting so much, DETACH again and just relax a bit.

So I'm not mad. I didn't take offense to anything that was said. I know you guys want the best for me (and everyone here) and sometimes we all need a little 2x4 (and sometimes a 2x8) to snap out of stuff.

And I'm glad I got the 2x4. I really thought a lot last night and we HAVE come a long way. And W is talking about our future. Is it as fast as I'd like? NO. But I'm not going to worry about it until the move details are more set and then I'll have the talk everyone here has been saying I need to have.

I thought about how even with the pullback after vacation that we were making what I consider progress. But after I told her about the move she retreated more. And I understand her side of it even if it's for F'd up reasons.

Ok, I could go on and on, but I won't. I agree with WDID and TAL that she's not going anywhere. Maybe I'm wrong and will get a surprise, but I don't think so. So when the move happens I'll tell her what I need to move forward and if she doesn't want to play along, it's dark time for me and she can figure it out on her own.

[whatdidido]

YOu have fb mail from me btw.

[Hope4us]

Thanks WDID. I've watched most of those clips online. It'd be nice if W would go see it with me, but there's about a ZERO chance of that happening.

W went to dinner with the EGF last night, but was not gone long. She did really say anything about EGF at all when she got home, but she was very talkative about her day, my Christmas party tonight, plans we have to go to that little German town near us tomorrow (they're having their Christmas in the town celebration), shopping for a dress for W's work Chrismas party next Sat (she's going with M, the new friend at work) and making up invitations for the open house we're going to have in a couple weeks.

It was all so normal it's scary. But it's these normal times that have me longing for more. But I guess that's not detaching then is it?

[whatdidido]

The message of the one I sent I thought was perfect for you.

Why aren't you going to your W's Christmas party with her? Don't you usually go with your spouses? That seems wierd to get a new dress and go with a friend like you are single.

You should be longing for more. Her REFUSAL to go to a movie with you, and take you to her Christmas party...just even those TWO things would be depressing. Sorry, not trying to "get you down" but I think you are past the detaching and waiting stage. I think you should be talking to her now.

[Hope4us]

Sorry WDID. I can see how you read it that way. I AM going to her Christmas party with her. W and M are going shopping for dresses on Sunday. Sorry for the confusion.

And it'll be interesting at her Christmas party. W has said a few things to me over the last couple months that make me think that there's been some gossip around her work site about her and OM. I have some job responsibilities at her Refinery and a number of the people I have to work with there have made little comments, but never coming right out and saying so, that make me think it was pretty well known that W and OM were fooling around. That, and the fact that EVERYONE there knows we're married, but W hasn't had her rings on in over a year now. So I'll be interested to see the reactions when we come to the party together.

My party tonight will be interesting also. I didn't tell anyone who works for me outright, but a lot of them figured it out. Like I said before, my admin knew 4 months before I'd admit to myself that it was probably happening and she's a straight talking, no B.S. kind of person, so that interaction will be interesting. I am confident that no one will treat her any differently, which is a good as it will show W that we CAN have a future without her being judged, which is one of the stumbling blocks you need to get past when this chit goes on.

But it's hers to deal with. I've already told her on a number of occasions that I would never let anyone treat her badly because of it and if they did, then they would no longer be in my life. But I know it's still hard for her.

Ok, gotta do some work. Talk to ya later.