Tipper, Upside, e- Thanks for checking in. I know I've only been posting sporadically, so it is probably hard to keep up with me (and stay interested??)
Anyway, things seems to be going pretty well. We went to C last week, then took a day off on Friday for a "date." We went to a late breakfast, a movie, then browsed in a bookstore and had a coffee. We need to do that more often!
We have not been very physical, which is bothering me a bit. He has not initiated and neither have I. I know this is a BIG ISSUE that we need to work on.
Also, he is overdue for checkups with his doctor and dentist. I hate to nag him about it and I do mention it occassionally, but I really wish he'd get on it and go. He is over 50 now and needs to take better care of himself!
Positives: 1. Good date day. 2. He's agreed to go to more regular counseling (every other week). 3. It's easier to talk to him about the mundane chores and errands that need to get done. I used to feel like I was heaping the responsibility on him when I would bring these kinds of things up. 4. He came to bed at the same time as me last night, instead of falling asleep on the couch which he does too often. 5. We discussed planning a family vacation for next year.
So, the holidays are here...this seems like a great opportunity for you and your H to snuggle in bed...which if you plan it right, could lead to more. Use your imagination...If I were you, I sure would be. I especially miss my H on cold nights.
As far as the check ups go, I know you want your H to be healthy BUT he doesn't want you to be his mom. Can you bring up in C that you want him to take care of himself and list the reasons why without nagging? I am sure the C would back you up.
As always, I like your positives. You are making steps forward and I wouldn't even call them baby steps anymore. I am happy for you and think things will just continue to get better and better...but still be prepared for those little bumps!!!
I wish you and your family a wonderful Thankgiving together.
You're right. It has been primo snuggling weather and we've done a little of that, but I do need to "plan" things better. I need to make it more of a priority.
Good idea to bring up the checkups at C. We don't go until next week. I mentioned him seeing the doctor again last night and said that I would make an appt for him. At first he said he would cancel it (in a lighthearted tone) and then he said he would go, he's been planning to go. He tends to procrastinate about everything, especially things that he doesn't want to do. I definitely don't want to act like his mother, but then again, I think he needs to see the doctor and his health is more important than how he reacts to me making the appointment.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! We're going away for the weekend to see my family. I hope it's stress-free! Ha!
Hi na- I am so happy that things are going well for you. Enjoy the holidays even if they are hectic. They will be but a memory before we know it...and we all need as many happy memories as we can get...or in my case because I am so forgetful, as many as I can remember!!!
I haven't written in a long while. Things have been crazy. H's mom is very sick and he's obviously very worried about her.
We had a horrible ice storm a few weeks back and lost power for 5 days, had a branch come through our roof and into our bedroom, had another branch fall onto our car and cause $2700 worth of damage and 2 BIG trees fell on our front lawn. What a mess, but I know that these are all things that can be fixed and in the greater scheme of things it's not that important. The W of a friend of our's passed away on Christmas day. They have 4 kids. It is so, so sad and has really put things into proper perspective for me.
R-wise, we are plugging along, getting along pretty well considering all of the life stress and holiday stress we've been experiencing the last few weeks. I feel like he's "home for good", but we have so much to work on, esp. the physical side of our R. We have another MC appt on Monday.
Thanks for listening. I wish everyone a Happy New Year. I hope 2009 brings health and happiness to you all.
Good God, you've been through a lot in the last while. It's a great sign that your R is surviving all the stress of the last few weeks. I hope you can work out the other issues through MC.
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz
Thanks addie. I have alot of faith in our R these days, despite the difficulties. We have a very strong friendship and I see that as a base to continue to build on.
Sadly, my MIL passed away last weekend. She was such a sweet lady.
I'm a little worried about my H. He seems to be avoiding thinking about it as much as possible. He talked to our C about MIL's passing on Monday. I don't know what else I can do but be there for him.
