*Should I fight custody?*already signed sep.agr

[cat03]

get you to shift your focus off of STBX and his current activities.

yes, true, it stung when I heard and learned of his new life with gf, him carrying as if his behavior didnt' affect the kids, it took me aback and it is something I 'm fighting hard to not care about.

I was even taken back to the past year and a half and wonder if I would've done something different perhaps this wouldn't have happen, trying to pin point where he went off the deep end.I see now that that is futile, dont' matter and only God knows who/what/where he lost his way, he is his own person and he choose to do what he did.

I dont' want to know more about that woman, I'm trying to now see her as a mother and hope that she treats my kids right, she'll obviously treat her kids better and there will be small injustices, but as long as she isn't a crack ho nor beating my kids I guess I just have to accept the fact she is going to be there for however long this crazy R of his lasts. I was surprised yesterday when stbx left the kids clothes to find out half of them where actually washed and nicely folded (of course it had to be her, he would've never thought doint that). I tried to see that as a positive point. Yes OT, it is not her fault stbx has no spine nor brain, though I'm pretty sure she's got her meal ticket since she barely works and doesn't have a car.

Whatever, it's his life. I'm still amazed at the hurt stbx has brought onto the children, I do hold him fully responsible for my son's anguish -- he sobbed last night in my bed telling me he sees nothing good in his dad and does not want to go back. I did tell him that when he is older he could choose where to stay but he said he didnt' want to leave his sister behind and would stay for her. My son has a heart of gold, that stupid man doesn't deserve such a good boy.

On the counselling issue. Does S10 want to go to counseling?

thank heavens he does, he even told me he was thinking of talking to a school counselor, I tried to explained him last night that hopefully his dad will understand him a bit better and things would be better for him, he sort of nodded yes to that.

Keyz, what a horrible situation, I'm glad they let you have your children. My son tells me everything (no, I dont' grill and actually rather not know what stbx and gf are up to). But I suspect there is any kind of abuse I'll be at the lawyers the next day.