2008 = Crazy Year (Numb 19)

[lost_in_space]

I like it.

MC
Thanks. Had cross posts going. The part I was hesitating about was that when I reread it, it sounded like I was in a "poor me" thing with the "find it difficult". Maybe keep it short but something more along "will be difficult to have good communication as long as om is in the picture.". ??

[whatdidido]

So what did you say?

I thought you would say what really is going on:

"W, we will not be going on the trip because you are seeing OM and want to leave the marriage. If this is the case, I need to protect us financially, and going on a trip to Hawaii is not possible. I haven't said anything yet because I was hoping you would tell me that you want to work on the marriage and stop all contact with OM."

Why are you making up stories, stalling, etc.? I think I'm still lost.

[lost_in_space]

wdid

Once again your clarity is wonderful and welcome.

Didn't say anything yet. W is still away. We are communicating electronically while she is away. I agree with your comments, but thought that would be better said face to face? Would be easy to "say" electronically, and would give her something to think about while gone.

[hopeful4her]

lis, I'm just as confused.

You DID tell her face to face, or so I thought. If I remember correctly, she kind of blew you off. The little communication you have been having, concerning this subject, is way off what you have been telling us. That it was flat out.

Not sure if you really need to say anything about the communication thing. She is not communicating with you and she knows it, but of course she is going to put it all on you. Ya'll are just going to go back and forth on that subject, I think.

Hang in there.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

So what did you say?

I thought you would say what really is going on:

"W, we will not be going on the trip because you are seeing OM and want to leave the marriage. If this is the case, I need to protect us financially, and going on a trip to Hawaii is not possible. I haven't said anything yet because I was hoping you would tell me that you want to work on the marriage and stop all contact with OM."

Why are you making up stories, stalling, etc.? I think I'm still lost.

What WDID said.

[lost_in_space]

H4H,
You are right that she blew me off when we discussed. There has been no real disc on this - my error was not saying it is done more forcefully.

PDT,
Thanks. I agree with everyone.

So here is the text going today:

W, I agree that it has been a while since we talked about cancelling the trip. In my opinion, we will not be going on the trip because you are continuing to see OM and want to leave the marriage. As such, I need to protect our family financially, and going on a trip to Hawaii is not feasible. I haven't said anything since we first talked about canceling because I was hoping you would tell me that you want to work on the marriage and stop all contact with OM.

OK?

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Drop the "in my opinion." It's a REALITY.

[lost_in_space]

PDT

Got it. Thx

[Tawnya]

Let us know how it goes..yeah..tho it is definitely more "harsh" than the original, it is what needs to be sent because of HER choices and she needs to see cause and effect of what she's doing in black and white and a little reality slap in the face

{{LIS}}

Tawnya

[lost_in_space]

(((Tawnya))). Thanks. It is more harsh, but I have to drop the nice guy stuff. This is a war and I have to realize that.

All, here is the final version. Last crack at it before sending...

W, I agree that it has been a while since we talked about cancelling the trip. We will not be going on the trip because you continued to see OM and want to leave the marriage and break up our family. As such, I need to protect our family financially, and going on a trip to Hawaii is not feasible. I haven't said anything since we first talked about canceling because I was hoping you would tell me that you want to work on the marriage and stop all contact with OM.

Major change is the break up the family part - too much???