Listen, you are reacting exactly the way he wants you to, and he will continue acting in a way to keep you angry and mad at him. It's much easier to D someone who is angry and unhappy with you. I'm sure he's very pleased with that. It confirms he's making the right decision.
Being angry isn't going to change the money situation. You need to fully separate your money from him (close --or drain your portion of assests from-- all shared accounts, credit cards, etc... first thing in the morning!!!). Then start your own accounts and begin taking care of things as if he died (with zero insurance!) yesterday. Get a renter or two. If possible, think of this "guy" who comes to your house to take the kid as free "child care."
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
