Quote: There's a part of me that feels that closure is only going to come if I see her. There's lots of people who say that the op doesn't owe us anything -- I feel a bit justified in saying that's not entirely true in my case -- she sought me out as a friend during the whole horrible time. She lied to me too. I'd like to face her but I don't know what I'd say. And, frankly, in my head I know that even that isn't going to be wise or provide closure.
this is so a part of my bad pma this week. my desire to confront her. you see, she and i were friends, she took care of my daughter for gods sake. i sat with her kids. i cooked them dinners. we were NEIGHBORS - i talked to her about my husband and my problems at a certain point. all the while she was sleeping with him. that is the extreme ACHE i feel this past week. teetering on the brink of wanting to just go kick her butt into next week, and the other side, of just wanting to sit down and ask her why? and then one other scene is to just come right out and be bigger than her, and forgive her. wow, this is the hard one this week.
the one thing i really got from this thread is how much you realized you were a "i need words" type person and that your husband was not gonna give that to you. he is very action oriented. hmmm, i am gonna file this away and check this out with my hubby. after all, it seems that we are married to twins!
(wanted to throw in here that i am sorry to hear about your cat - i am not a cat lover, but your post about putting it to sleep brought tears - sorry)
thank you to jeanine for this comment
Quote: To feel comfortable in one's own skin is a truly wonderful thing, and to have achieved that, even if just for a day, is still an accomplishment of significant proportions.
i want this, i am striving for this
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wow, if there was one more underlying theme to this thread was the orientation you got with yourself and how that led you to all the feelings you were having about your husband and his affair (or the knowledge of whether it was still going on)
at one point you mentioned about feeling love "unconditionally" - i have always put conditions on my love, from child times, so this is an area i have been working on...loving H unconditionally - maybe like begets like and i will be able to receive the same treatment...we shall see
