Thanks, Pup. I don't think I'll really need it. I think his actions re: D and visitation speak for themselves, so I dont' think custody will be a big problem. In Indiana they generally go by pretty standard guidelines unless there's a big issue in mom's life. I also have a printout of the early email convos with OW (and so does my L) and that will be a factor as well.
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012