You are a lifesaver! You may need to start writing books. I am printing this post of yours and taping it to my mirror. I wish I could figure out how to quote on this goofy site. You are right! I forgot all about the importance of setting clear, finite, simple, attainable goals. It is all how one looks at this.
Obviously, my goal was unattainable and way too large: I want H to want to reconcile. Yeah, so does everyone. That was not going to happen with one little email, so I set myself up to feel defeated.
Restated goal: have H reply to my email and thank me. Goal achieved. Now, I use that to fuel the PMA/hope tank.
It is sooooo hard to stop focusing on the future and stay in the present. In the present, I tried something and it got a positive result. Now, wait a while, live my life and see if it sparks any action from H. Take note of what does or does not happen.
And thank you for the encouragement about my strength and the compliment. I need to work on my belief in myself. I have good self-esteem, I just have a hard time thinking of myself as strong. All the damned crying and wanting H back so badly makes me feel weak and pitiful.
I will reread my posts.
Beth
p.s. Will have to miss my first meetup event for work. UGH!!!
