Quoting eskb:
Sage,

Good Mars/Venus list. A lot of truth there. It would be interesting if someone would post an equivalent list about women, for the men here.

Brian


Brian --

Here's what I remember from the book (didn't have to write them down since I'm living them!)

1. "women" are like waves (remember that "men" are like rubber bands!) when it comes to intimacy. (What this means to the engineer in me is that men tend to be "on" or "off", i.e., discrete, when it comes to intimacy and then women are more continuous -- yah, their intimate feelings ebb and flow but in a more fluid fashion)

2. The "wave" theory is why "women" need routine reassurance from their spouse that they are loved, important, etc.

3. "woman" share problems and offer assistance as a way of building relationships. When a "woman" wants to talk about her feelings, she's building intimacy -- unfortunately, hearing about a "woman's" feelings can feel like an attack to a man (even though she's just sharing, she's NOT blaming him)

3. "woman" want to be listened to, they resent it when men jump quickly to try to solve their problems.

4. "women" give points at the same rate for both big things and little things (whereas men tend to give big points for the big things and little points for the little things). Therefore, a man should focus on the little things in order to quickly accumulate points.

5. A woman will keep "giving" even though she feels as though she's given more than her spouse (this is apparently counter to what men do) so men ASSume that things are AOK if a woman is still giving.

6. If a "woman" feels as though she's REALLY been giving more than her spouse, she will SUBTRACT her points from his. This one's sort of funny but I also think it can be very true. In other words...if I think I'm doing twice as much around the house as my husband is doing, I will SUPPOSEDLY subtract my 20 points from his 10 points leaving him with minus 10 points! (And, in a very sorry state indeed!). A "woman" will give points back generously, though, when she feels as though the balance is evened up again.

7. If a "woman" doesn't feel as though her feelings were "heard" she'll keep coming back to the same complaint again and again and again...

If I think of more, I'll post them. I DO strongly recommend the book...

Sage

Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.