Hey guys... How have you been chicki?! I'm here...just been away for awhile dealing with stuff... Let's see...went to court for parenting time...judge ordered no overnights with GF present until after the new year. But he can have her around them during the day when he has them every other weekend. So he takes them from in the mornings around 10 til 7:30pm. If he has GF present for overnights before the new year, STBX will go to jail. He also ordered him to pay for half of my lawyer that stbx didn't know about. Of course, I didn't know about him until the Friday before court which was on Monday! But my lawyer used to be a referee for my state for over 20 years. He has the kids best interest at hand. And that's what I want. Things got very heated with stbx the day before Thanksgiving. I told him if we don't learn to interact with each other regarding our kids then this is exactly how our phone calls would be for the 16 years. I'm tired of being yelled at and talked to like I'm 5. So until he talk to me like an adult without yelling, I have nothing further to talk to him about and he can contact my lawyer if he has anything to say to me. And GF has been sitting in the car every single time he comes to get the kids and drop them off. It's really pathetic. And it's killing me not to say anything to him about her throwing her cigarettes out in my driveway and yard. I mean seriously, throw them out in the road before you get to my house or buy a freakin ashtray! I'm tired of picking them up! I spent the holidays with my inlaws. We actually had a great time! Stbx picked the kids up around 2, I had to pull MIL back in the house when they were leaving cuz she was about to go off on the GF! So BIL brought out Capt Morgan, and everything was fine after that! lol BIL informed me that stbx is on an online dating site trying to hook up with BIL's cousin or something. Which I think is kinda funny seeing as he's living with GF. We have our meeting tomorrow at the courthouse regarding child support. I decorated my house for the holidays this weekend. It seriously looks like Santa threw up in my house! lol But it's festive and I like it. It's the first year I've ever gone all out like this. But it's my favorite time of year and I'm not going to let stbx bring me down like he did last year. And I'm kinda hoping it will get my MIL in the spirit. She usually goes all out decorating but she's having a hard time with it this year. Instead she's doing retail therapy! Which I don't mind either cuz she's buying stuff for my kids! lol I went back for one more day of clinicals yesterday just to get alittle bit more comfortable. I just need to make an appointment to get my certificate and it will be official!! I've already applied at several hospitals here. So we'll see... That's really about it. Day by day. I was spending alot of time with some mutual friends of our's. But I started seeing some red flags. I'm thinking one of them is keeping tabs on me for stbx. So I'm going to start distancing myself from them a bit. That's really about it! And chasing after my crazy kids during the day! Love them to death, but man! They are high energy here lately!! Hope everyone is doing well and had nice holidays!
Me- 29 X - 30 M - 7.5 years Final April 2009 S - 2005 D - 2007
Don't make someone a priority who only makes you an option.
A wise fish once said...Just keep swimming...Just keep swimming!
Oh, also, during our conversation right before Thanksgiving, I told him the way we were interacting with each other was not what was best for the kids. That it was best for the kids if we could work on interacting with each other regarding them. He said what was best for the kids was if me and GF could get along. I told him no, what was best for the kids is if me and her had absolutely not contact right now. And that he needed to stop bringing her into our conversations regarding OUR children. (He keeps bringing her name up at the most random times!) I mean really!? How in h*ll was it best for the kids if me and OW got along!? Right now. I mean, she wants to be my friend! He told me this! I'm sorry, but this is not an episode of Reba. We're not going to be having sleep overs and doing each others hair and nails! All she does is bring drama in my life and I don't need that! I need to surround myself with positive influences in my life right now. If I could, I'd not have HIM in my life right now!!
Me- 29 X - 30 M - 7.5 years Final April 2009 S - 2005 D - 2007
Don't make someone a priority who only makes you an option.
A wise fish once said...Just keep swimming...Just keep swimming!
So I just checked our case online....its different than the order that we signed. I know I need to contact my lawyer regarding this. The order we signed said he could only have overnights if GF was not present. After Jan 1st, that would change to where the GF could be present for overnights. The judge also said that if GF is present before the first of the year, stbx would go to jail. Well, like I said, I looked online at our case to check and see if my answer and counter complaint had been filed. It has. But it also said the Parenting Time Hearing resulted as followed...No overnights with father for first 6 months. Result - Held - Domestic. So in ya'll opinions...which one do we go by? My thoughts are the judge changed his mind. But because I have representation, I do not receive anything in the mail from the courthouse, it is all sent to my attorney. I believe the judge remembered us from earlier in the year and thought it was the same case and not a new one. That's why he said only until the beginning of the year. Then maybe he went back and looked and realized that it was a new case and it was just started. That's why he decided to change it to 6 months. Any ideas?
Me- 29 X - 30 M - 7.5 years Final April 2009 S - 2005 D - 2007
Don't make someone a priority who only makes you an option.
A wise fish once said...Just keep swimming...Just keep swimming!
that's what i'm thinking. but they're both by the judge. he told us in the courtroom the first part about not until the first of the year with GF being present after that. but online, it says 6 months. so i'm wondering which one we're supposed to go by. i know i would feel more comfortable with the 6 month one!
Me- 29 X - 30 M - 7.5 years Final April 2009 S - 2005 D - 2007
Don't make someone a priority who only makes you an option.
A wise fish once said...Just keep swimming...Just keep swimming!
Well, just spoke with my attorney's office...we have to go with the order we orginially had. After the 1st of the year, he can have them for overnites with GF. Sucks. Also, just received my final recommendation from the courts for child support. They messed up. It's about $400 less a month, even tho stbx makes the same amount of money and will be making more next month. They have his gross income as $20,000 less a year. They told us that day we were there that it wouldn't be that different than the previous recommendation from our last case. But $400, that's quite a bit different! I'm just a plethora of good tidings today. I'm having a difficult time. S3 is having a difficult time, being very clingy to me and making many comments about missing his dad. I'm trying to handle it, but it's hard. I have no money for presents for the kids this year, stbx made a point of asking me about opening presents before he picks them up Christmas Day. He asked me about him having an overnite with them at Christmas, even tho our court order explains the conditions to them, he wants to go against it. Blaming me for the D. Getting a bunch of 'no' emails for job applications I sent out. My checking account is overdrawn. And I can't find a divorce support group in my area that I don't have to pay for! I'm missing my family. It's just a very difficult time right now.
Me- 29 X - 30 M - 7.5 years Final April 2009 S - 2005 D - 2007
Don't make someone a priority who only makes you an option.
A wise fish once said...Just keep swimming...Just keep swimming!
