. You know he said something interesting the other day...about how good he's been trying to be...and that he thinks he's done really well with the cancer treatment and handling it. Which is true. But it makes me think...how much is the guy working just to maintain all the time? I think he must be constantly "trying" to keep it together...so it's not surprising that he blows sometimes. Just thinking out loud . .
I'm glad he at least apologized rather quickly.
He does sound like someone who tries really hard to keep it together. And yes, that is a set-up to blow.
I've been thinking about the whole "negativity" thing. If I remember this right, his dad jumped on him at dinner for complaining about something about his job. When H sent the email to you about changing he said something like he needed to eliminate his negative side. And H gets mad at you for being negative about the football game in the bar last weekend. It sounds like in his family there was no room to have anything but a positive emotion. Only the parents could be negative and complain. That's just not human. Can he accept being human?
Thinking in Stosny terms now, I wonder if your H feels disregarded in some way when the house isn't perfect, like if he mattered to you then things would be a certain way when he gets home. But then, it is up to HIM to regulate his feelings and to speak with you privately and respectfully about any issues he may have.
