Snodderly, I forgot to mention that when I get a nasty e-mail from H I shout at the screen and sometimes I write a nasty reply to H, but I have never sent it so far. I do need to get rid of my anger and it helps. As you said I keep my replies friendly.
I hope you have a wonderful weekend. I do know what you mean about getting nasty emails or phone calls from you H. I haven't talked or seen mine since April so that has been hard in a way but it also has me working on forgiveness. Right now something that has been helping me is when I think about all the nasty stuff he said to me or him with OW or anything about this past year I just try to put it out of my mind & say "H I forgive you & bless you".
You may not be at that point right now, but it's just something that I have to work on for me.
You are such a wonderful person & you do not deserve him to be blaming you for this, it's his doing & he will have to answer for his wrongs.
True, I'm in total agreement w/nlt. You do not deserve his nasty emails or phone calls. It's his way of brow beating you into feeling guilty and sorry for him, w/the hopes that he can manipulate you into stepping back and giving him what he wants. He's acting out and you will need to find a way to hit the delete button on those types of messages.
It's going to take some time for you to work on forgiveness, but you will. Take it one day at a time and do not allow him to ruin your day.
I do hope that you'll enjoy the weekend.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thinking of you. You do not deserve anything nasty from him. I think you are doing a fantastic job of getting out there and meeting people and doing things you like to do.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Hi glamgirl, Thank you for your post. Yes the anger creeps in occasionally. I am angry about H's behaviour and that he messed up our good lives. But obviously, he thought his life was not so good! I must admit however, my anger does not last very long. I am usually more sad than angry.
Hi nlt, Thanks for your wishes and your kind words. - I had quite a good week-end.
Strangely enough, I have forgiven H a long time ago that he left me and had OW. I also hardly ever think of him with OW. I usually picture him alone or with me. But I have trouble forgiving him completely for being nasty to me.
Hi Snodderly, Thanks for your post. At least H does not ruin my days anymore.
Have a lovely week.
Hi MWG, Thank you for thinking of me and your encouraging words. I have enjoyed a lot of my activities lately.
Last Friday I had a good time at the club's Christmas party. I met another nice lady I exchanged addresses with. She likes music and hopefully, she might come to some concerts with me.
H sent me a FRIENDLY e-mail asking me for some info. He also wrote that his health is good again and that he is not grumpy anymore! He also sent me his best wishes! I sent him the requested info.
He then returned another friendly e-mail and mentioned he heard that I wanted to go to the place for winter where we had our apartment. He thought it was not a bad idea and it is a shame that WE don't have a small place of our own to go to!!!!! He also said that we should stay friends as life is too short to be anything else! - Gee, what is going on in his mind?????
