C says C will set boundaries for H. C doesn't want me to play bad cop right now, fine by me. So that means, H will be seeing kids at prearranged times and committing to them. We'll see...
C also says that it's better to have an agreement in place in case an accident happens to one of us and there's no will and the OW comes to fight for a portion of our assets. Good point, that's the last thing I want.
C says give it 12 months, see how things progress. I really want to since I don't want D. I am nervous though that any serious conversations will turn confrontational. That's the last thing I want, for things to go backwards. I know things have not been perfect but at least we are getting along on the surface. C says H won't press for D, which is good but I will believe it only if I see it. C also says H has noticed changes in me, I said yeah, I have changed. I am much more happier (mainly because I've adjusted my expectations, don't have to worry about his whereabouts, don't have to think of ways to please him, don't have to control the kids so won't piss H off, it's a lot less pressure living without H, actually).
All this news is good but since H doesn't say much to me at all about me or about himself, I am getting everything secondhand thru C. I hope C is not just blowing smoke. I hope he is telling me the truth but that relies on H telling C the truth... A lot of if's.
I am getting a little bit hopeful again. I don't want to raise my own expectations. Haven't even seen H for ages. So we'll see what his mood is like this weekend. Eggshells...
Boy, we'll see how things go in the next few weeks. We'll probably try to get together again to talk about agreement. C assured me that our counselling session will be on agreement and not D. OK, if you're sure.
Me:39 H:40 S:9 D:7 First Bomb ONS:June 07 Second Bomb OW: March 08 Separated: March 08 M:15 yrs T:18 yrs H deep into A with OW Achieved ACCEPTANCE May 30, 09
