Another one bites the dust (2)

[No Longer BH]

ROOT - thanks for the advice. I agree, groups are the way to go. That is mostly what I do...go out with my female friends. All but one are M and the one singleton is going through a MLC of her own. That it makes it kind of hard to relate when going out but I find ways to have fun.

OEO has sent me an email today. I have not read it. It actually makes me very anger (and we all know that I have enough anger already). I feel like he is refusing to honor my boundaries. Well, he is going to have to learn that just because he sends an email doesnt mean I will read it and respond to it. He HAS to go through my brother if he wants contact. He could not even go an entire week without trying to have contact.

I have a question for all of you wise DBers. First of all, I have to preface that when it comes to MLC, I have lost all faith in DBing techniques. Maybe I am jaded, maybe it it just the anger. I feel like I kept holding on to the idea that I could save my marriage alone if I just did all of the right things. Well, I did them and he still chose his distructive path. I no longer want to drown with his sinking ship and trust me it is spirally down.

My question is, should I start acting like I am D? What I mean by that is when it comes to OEO's weekly visits, I am still allowing him to come into my home for them. I kind of feel like I am making things pretty easy and he is invading my space. He is not being forced to face the reality of his decision. I truly want my S to have a R with his father, yet how far do I go for OEO? If we were D today he would NOT be able to set foot in my home, yet that is what I am allowing him to do. Should I continue this or should I cut it off along with everything else so he has to face the reality of his choices?

I appreciate all of your insight and am looking forward to your all of your wisdom. I am just trying to heal at this point......